News and Commentary

MAD LIBS: Leftist Protesters Scramble To Fill In Blank Posters With SCOTUS Nominee’s Name

It was a wild night outside the Supreme Court Monday, as a leftist demonstrators, organized by NARAL, scrambled to find the most appropriate sign to protest President Donald Trump’s nominee to replace outgoing Justice Anthony Kennedy.

There was one problem, though: the White House remained tight-lipped on Trump’s choice, and without a leak, the protesters had to come prepared for any inevitability.

Under the clear assumption that any nominee would be, by definition, an affront to their “human rights,” demonstrators carried fill-in-the-blank signs and fistfuls of markers, so that they could make appropriate placards on the spot.

As soon as Brett Kavanaugh’s name was officially announced, they set to work:

Some organizations flush with cash, like NARAL, came prepared with several different signs, one for each possible nominee.

Apparently, Kavanaugh was such an outside choice, he didn’t merit his own hashtag.

It’s not clear what happened to the discarded signs, with the wrong names on them. They could have been tossed away in a remarkably un-environmentally-friendly display of waste, or perhaps they will be boxed and shipped to the less fortunate, like those sad sample t-shirts made for the losing Super Bowl team.

Unable to afford several signs and without recourse to art supplies, a handful of protesters just went with whatever they had lying around.