The Daily Wire

Klavan: I’m Angry, And So I’m Voting For Donald Trump

By  Andrew Klavan

Donald Trump has captured the anger and frustrations of millions of Americans. Why are they so angry? Because they have spent the last seven years watching the lawless Obama Administration trample their rights while the Republican elites play failure theater and feign outrage. But does that make voting Trump a good decision?


I’m angry – and so I’m voting for Donald Trump.

I’m angry about illegal immigration, and so I’m voting for Donald Trump because he said he would build a huge wall to keep out just the sort of undocumented workers he hired to clear ground for Trump Tower in New York, and because he said he’d force all the illegals to leave the country and then let them all back in and he said he’d limit the number of skilled workers that can come here and then he said he wouldn’t do that and then he secretly told the New York Times he didn’t mean any of it so I don’t really know what the hell he’s saying. But I’m angry so I’m voting for him.

I’m angry about Islamic terrorism so I’m voting for Donald Trump because he said he’d register all Muslim-Americans in a database and that he’d not only torture terrorists but kill their wives and children and even if that was against the law he’d order the military to do it and they’d have to because he would be the president and they’d have to do what he said, because this is America where the president doesn’t have to obey the law and can do whatever he wants and… and he’ll build up the military without it costing anything and okay none of that makes sense but it doesn’t matter because I’m angry, so I’m voting for him.

I’m angry about political correctness too and so I’m voting for Donald Trump because he just comes right out and makes fun of handicapped people and short people and anyone who doesn’t have as much money as he does and women especially – he makes fun of their looks and their periods and he says they should be treated like shit, [laughing] and I just think that’s… [stops laughing] actually, that’s not exactly politically incorrect… that’s more like… evil… really… But I’m angry so I’m voting for him!

And… and… I’m angry about free trade for some reason… and about people making stuff cheaper overseas so it costs less here and I can afford it… and I’m angry about the Democrats Donald Trump gave money to, and all the money we spend on entitlements that he says he’ll keep spending… and so I’m voting for Donald Trump because… because I’m angry and… and I don’t make very good decisions when I’m angry… so maybe I should calm down. And vote for someone else. Who would be a better president. And not such a schmuck.

I’m Andrew Klavan for the Daily Wire.

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