Hipster Millennials Aren’t Saving For Retirement Because Capitalism ‘Won’t Exist By Then’

Some millennials aren’t saving for retirement in the hopes that by the time they reach age 65, Capitalism will be a thing of the past.

In an incredible article on Salon, a full two-thirds of millennials admit that they haven’t started a savings account for their golden years. But, perhaps more shocking, a significant group of millennials seem to believe they don’t need to, because by the time they’re old enough to stop working, America will have become a Socialist Workers paradise which will no longer require them to meet financial obligations.

Most of the millenials Salon cites have typical millennial money woes. People entering the job market in the last decade have found themselves largely in a gig economy, faced with mounting student debt and fewer jobs that offer benefits.

Universities are charging more for four year degrees, even though the market demand for, say, degrees in Beyonce Studies is remarkably low, because the government freely hands out student loans, regardless of risk. Once out in the real world, it’s now harder for millennials who don’t consider the return on investment for their degree up front to sustain student loan payments while affording some of life’s necessities. Add into that things like the Obamacare exchanges, which freed employers from providing health insurance, and you’ve trapped an entire generation out of savings.

The solution to these problems, though, isn’t a scenario in which the rich simply pay for everything — if only because the rich only stay rich for so long at that rate. But, instead of making some better, more realistic choices, that’s what some millennials are counting on.

“When I’m at retirement age, around 2050, I think it’s possible we will have seen a breakdown in modern society,” one millennial told Salon, suggesting that “capitalism” will have morphed into a “complete Plutocracy” by then, even though what the United States has now is not actually pure “capitalism.”

Another had an even wilder idea. “Capitalism might still exist [in 2050], but I don’t expect people will be happy about it,” he said. “[M]y ideal economic model is one where all basic necessities are abundant and free, everyone works a few hours a week at the necessary chores of society like garbage collection and machine maintenance, then has the rest of their lives free to pursue whatever projects—be they art, leisure, or industry—that they desire.”

Literally, his ideal situation is one in which people don’t actually provide any means of financial support to the state. It may come as no surprise that of the three millennials Salon spoke to, none have a real job. One is a musician, one is an artisan chocolatier, and the third is a political consultant.

Another, a “student activist,” has already gambled wrong. “Not only am I not saving for retirement, I have never had a serious job because I have thought capitalism would be f**ked since I was a teenager.”

Others are banking on a “nuclear holocaust,” or an “environmental apocalypse” that will render money meaningless — two things that don’t seem like likely possibilities.

Good luck!