Happy Valentines Day? President Trump Ruining People’s Love Lives, Causing ‘Post-Trump Sex Disorder’

If things have gotten a little … cold … in the bedroom lately, it turns out you can blame President Donald Trump.

According to a “sex expert” who spoke to the far-left publication Salon, Trump is having an outsized effect on people’s love lives across the country, causing bouts of apathy, listlessness, and just a general lack of “being in the mood.”