Valentine’s Day is here, and so I thought, as the resident Catholic at Daily Wire (take that, Michael Knowles!), it would be appropriate and, who knows, maybe even helpful, to talk about it.
Now, the first thing I should tell you is that I am not American. I’m Australian. When I moved to America back in 2005, I was genuinely shocked at how many holidays you guys have. Hallmark and unbridled capitalism. That’s who I’m blaming!
But the truth is that I have a knee-jerk reaction to being told that I must celebrate something. When that happens, I take the reverse position and refuse to celebrate it. This is how I feel about Valentine’s Day. As my dear wife can attest, not once in our 20 years of marriage have I bought her flowers on Valentine’s day. It’s my petty way of fighting back against the commercialization of Catholic feast days. That’ll show ‘em!
But enough about me, who is this St. Valentine fella, anyway? How might we as Catholics celebrate a day named for him despite — or even in answer to — the marketing blitz that accompanies it?
St. Valentine
Perhaps the most extraordinary thing about St. Valentine is how extraordinarily little we know about him. Almost nothing. Maybe nothing at all.
One thing we can say with certainty is that “Valentine” is English for the Latin Valentinus, a fairly common name in the early Church. Valentinus comes from the root-word valens, meaning strong or worthy. But here’s where things get fuzzy: Early Christian records point to at least three martyrs named Valentinus, all honored on February 14.
So, briefly, one of these martyrs was a Roman priest who lived during the third-century persecutions and was executed for refusing to renounce Christ. Another was the Bishop of Terni, also martyred around the same time. Both were said to be buried along the Via Flaminia. By the Middle Ages, pilgrims were honoring “Saint Valentine” without being quite sure which one he was. Some historians even suspect they were the same man, remembered differently by different communities. And then there’s a third Valentine, a North African martyr and his companions. This Valentine is only mentioned in passing, without a story, like so many early Christian witnesses.
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You can see why there would be some confusion about St. Valentine. When several men share the same name, live in the same period, die in similar ways, and are remembered by different Christian communities, their stories naturally begin to overlap. What survives in the historical record is not one clear biography, but several distinct witnesses remembered under the same name. What this means is that once we move beyond the bare historical facts, we’re no longer dealing with a single, settled biography. All that survives are traditions. Some early, some later, some more detailed than others.
But there is value to be found in these traditions. Let’s look at two stories that may or may not have happened. Each, in its own way, nourishes our faith, and our understanding of what it means to live as a Christian.
First Story
In one particularly popular account, Valentine was a third-century Italian bishop from Terni, a city north of Rome. He ran into trouble for the usual reasons Christians ran into trouble back then: He kept being Christian. This did not sit well with Emperor Claudius II.
Valentine was placed under house arrest in the home of a Roman judge named Asterius, presumably so he could think about what he’d done and change his ways. Instead, he spent his time doing what Christians are famously bad at not doing. He talked about Jesus. A lot.
Eventually, Asterius, who was unconvinced and likely a bit worn down, decided to turn the situation into a test. If Valentine’s God were real, surely he could prove it by curing the judge’s blind daughter. Valentine agreed, placed his hands on the girl’s eyes, and she received her sight.
This, understandably, made an impression.
Asterius, now trembling with wonder, asked Valentine what he should do in response to such a miracle. Valentine told him to destroy the false gods in his house and be baptized. Which Asterius did. Asterius, along with his entire household, was baptized, standing, we’re told, among the broken fragments of their former idols. A strong visual.
Word of all this eventually reached the emperor. Valentine was summoned before Claudius himself, who, according to the story, found him quite charming. Sadly, charm only gets you so far when you refuse to renounce your faith. Claudius ordered Valentine executed.
And, so, Valentine was beaten with clubs and beheaded outside the Flaminian Gate on February 14, 269. But not before writing a note of comfort to the girl whose sight he had restored, signing it, “From your Valentine.”
It’s a lovely story. Whether it’s true or not, we don’t know.
Second Story
Another story has Valentine as a Roman priest quietly helping Christians during the reign of Emperor Claudius. Claudius decided that unmarried men made better soldiers than married ones. Wives, apparently, were bad for morale. Some things never change…which is also why I don’t buy my wife flowers. That’s a joke, a bad one, but a joke nonetheless.
Anyway, the point is that the emperor outlawed marriage for young men altogether.
Valentine, undeterred by the imperial decree, carried on marrying couples anyway, but discreetly. The side benefit was that married men could then avoid being drafted into the emperor’s pagan army. Obviously, Claudius took a dim view of this situation once he noticed. Valentine was eventually hauled before the emperor. Claudius rather liked him, found him charming, and very nearly let him off. Unfortunately, Valentine would not stop being Christian, and this proved a deal-breaker. He was sentenced to death.
From there, the stories begin to multiply, and rather enthusiastically. In one telling, Valentine refuses to worship the Roman gods, is thrown into prison, and heals the blind daughter of his jailer. In another, he leaves her a note before his execution, signed, “From your Valentine,” which is either deeply moving or suspiciously tidy, depending on your temperament.
So, what can we take away from these varying traditions?
Well, we could reflect on the certainty of death and what remains after us in this world. There may be stories told about us after we are gone — for a while — until the people telling those stories themselves are gone. A deeper reflection leads us to the truth that ultimately only one person will remember us; only one person knows the inner truth of our lives. And that person is God.
This being true, we Christians should place our stories in the hands of the only One who’s remembrance matters. As the ancient saying goes, “Preach the Gospel, die, and be forgotten.” Yes, forgotten to the world, but remembered by God. St. Valentine may exist for us in the hazy record of varying traditions. But God knows the truth. In God, Valentinus or the several men for whom he stands, is known and loved for eternity.
A Prayer to Saint Valentine
Let’s end where the Church has always ended: in prayer.
Saint Valentine, faithful martyr of Christ,
you who bore witness to love stronger than fear and hope stronger than death,
pray for us.
Pray for those who are married,
that their love may be patient, enduring, and rooted in truth.
Pray for those who long for love,
that they may seek not merely affection, but holiness.
Pray for those who are wounded by love,
that they may find healing in the Heart of Christ.
Teach us that real love is not fragile or fleeting,
but willing to suffer, to remain, and to give itself fully.
Saint Valentine,
martyr of faithful love,
pray for us.
Amen.
And now, if you will excuse me, I’m going to pick up some flowers for my wife!
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