University of Oklahoma: White People Singing Rihanna a ‘Microaggression’

The University of Oklahoma (OU) has got it right, folks. Too long have we quietly suffered while our female friends sang Rihanna’s “like I’m the only girl in the world” at the top of their lungs. Too long have we endured our glasses shattering to the sound of “diamonds in the sky.” Too long has walking outside with an umbrella been accompanied with the sound, “ella-ella-ella-ey-ey.” The time has come for a University to put an end to our suffering once and for all.

“Human relations theory” students at the state-funded university are being taught that they can no longer sing pop-singer Rihanna’s songs because they are white. In a lesson on “privilege” and “microaggressions,” the students were taught that having white students sing songs of black singers is “insulting” and “racist” because the white students have more privilege than the black students have.

“I was told as a white woman it’s insulting and a microaggression for me to cover or sing a Rihanna song because I’m not from Barbados,” a student from the class told Fox News’ Todd Starnes. “I was literally told to go sing the Star-Spangled Banner.”

In order to determine how much “privilege” they have, the students were assigned a checklist of 100 questions such as the following:

· I am white.

· I have never been told I would “burn in hell” for my sexual orientation.

· I still identify as the gender I was born in.

· I work in a salaried job.

· I have never done my taxes myself.

· I have had an unpaid internship.

· I don’t know what “Sallie Mae” is.

· I have frequent flier miles.

· I spend Spring Breaks abroad.

· My parents are heterosexual.

· I can afford a therapist.

· I’ve used prescription drugs recreationally.

· I have never been called a terrorist.

· I have never questioned any of my identities.

· I had a car in high school.

· I’ve always had cable.

Straight white males are considered privileged. Straight white females are considered less-privileged but still more privileged than straight black females or gay white females, who are considered under-privileged. Christians are considered privileged, while atheists are considered underprivileged. Catch the drift?

In another activity, the students were asked to decide whether 32 scenarios involving conversations were microaggressions.

“That’s so gay,” is an example of a microaggression listed by the professor. “I need a new gay (best friend),” is an example of another. Of course, all of the 32 scenarios were determined by the class to be microaggressions.

Probably the most contested scenario, the student told Starnes, was one in which a religious person discusses gay marriage, saying, “I think true marriage is between a man and a woman because that’s what the Bible says, but I respect everyone’s choices.”

“The professor said if it (your opinion) hurts others you should question those views – specifically the Bible,” the student said. “The professor said we should question the Bible and question where those views came from.”

The student described the situation as “beyond frustrating” because the professors were trying to push an anti-Christian agenda in the classroom.

But what if… what if the professor was on our side and simply was sick of hearing pre-pubescent white kids strutting in Rihanna bling and cussing at the top of their lungs, “B**** better have my money!”

In that case, we really owe you, OU.