News and Commentary

Not The Onion: PETA Frees Animal Crackers From Cages

Ashe Schow

If you enjoy eating crackers in the shape of animals but always felt the cartoon depiction of those animals behind bars as if they’re traveling in an old-time circus was just too cruel, then I have good news for you.

After pressure from the left-wing People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals* (PETA), those cartoon animals are now free to roam the plains of Africa, where they’ll probably kill each other in a hand-drawn massacre of natural selection.

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