Negotiating The Heck Out Of Terrorists In Michigan

“Don’t negotiate with terrorists,” the saying goes. So, presumably, it would be wise to avoid debating them, too.

On Thursday evening, the two men battling for the Democratic-held Michigan Senate seat, vacated by the retiring Gary Peters, took to the debate stage to trade insults, “your momma” lines, and awkward truths. On the Right stood Mike Rogers, former FBI agent, former House Intelligence Committee chair, and a man who lost the 2024 race by roughly 19,000 votes. On the left-of-Lenin Left stood Abdulrahman El-Sayed, the non-physician, terrorist sympathizer.

Rogers, luckily, never had to negotiate with the man, but he debated the heck out of the mini-Marxist, who wore more sass smeared across his face than my sisters and I managed through all of our most volatile teenage years combined.

We can forgive El-Sayed’s saucy insolence, but only if he pleads postpartum depression or some such nonsense.

The only other explanations are short-man syndrome, angst over being stuck in Michigan when he’d rather be back in New York, or the simple fact that he’s an aggrieved anti-American itching to tear down our supposedly colonial, oppressive systems with his destructive, deranged policy.

It might be a dangerous concoction of all three.

Rogers launched his missile barrage at the dual citizen of Egypt and America by probing the oddities of his meteoric rise.

How does a guy who’s had less than four years of work experience, which, by the way, on the campaign trail he said was ten, own a luxury property in the United Arab Emirates? He’s worth a million bucks! Somebody has to tell me how this math works … He lied about being a physician. He lied about being an Egyptian citizen … That’s a conman.

You tell ’em, Mike!

El-Sayed’s only response was to bellow that Rogers owns a home in Florida, like every other normal, northern male in his retirement era. Rogers clapped back: “Well, you have one in Dubai. At least mine is in America.”

Based.

If I may add to this barrage, Mr. Abdulrahman also lied about his positions on defunding the police, lied about taking money from billionaires, and lied about his military service. His former campaign staffer says he behaves like a mobster, telling one group one thing and another the opposite hours later. The same staffer says his masculinity is a performance, and that he considers farting one of the funniest things a person can do.

Stinky! That’s not very halal of him.

You know what else smells, besides his pants? The fact that he cannot, for the life of him, admit that Iran is a bigger threat to the United States than Israel. He’s been asked a million times, and on every occasion he looks like he wants to put a Tehran-sized hole in his head. The angry elf calls it a dumb question, and then deflects. Really, the only thing dumber than his answer is that we allowed a man whose sister-in-law is on a terror watchlist, whose mother worked for a designated terror group that provided direct financial support to Bin Laden, whose father-in-law is on the board of CAIR, and who himself is funded by terror groups and mourns the death of tyrannical terror dictators… to get within spitting distance of a Senate seat.

At some point, Americans chose lattes and scrolling over logic and sense. Sigh.

The debate stage was a window into a future as bright as Jahannam’s basement, should Mr. Abdulrahman be elected. He boasted about granting amnesty to millions of illegal immigrants. He lied in real time about letting families keep their private health insurance, after years of screeching on Zoom calls about abolishing it. And he dismissed the acknowledgment of the third anniversary of October 7, when more than 1,200 men, women, and children were raped, murdered, and dismembered, as political theater.

Political theater! says the mini Muslim Marxist who pretends to like women, whites, blacks, and Jews, depending on which room he’s standing in. He’s the Cirque du Soleil of sincerity.

It was so bad that even the CNN panel with Abby Phillip couldn’t believe how blatantly he exposed his inner impious intentions by sassily failing to condemn the IRGC, Hamas, Hezbollah, and al-Qaeda. Panelist Peter Meijer said he simply can’t get this guy! He can’t understand why the terror sympathizer refuses to say the terrorists are bad! Yeah, Pete. It’s a riddle wrapped in a mystery inside an enigma. 

Noah Rothman then asked the lone, dissenting, retard on the panel, Van Lathan, “Are you not disturbed by the level of comfort that he evinces with the people who do set out to kill Americans, kill Jews, kill civilians?” Lathan’s answer: “NOPE.” He even made the popping sound on the “P.”

I imagine that’s exactly how Abdul answers his wife when she asks him to stop farting in public.

“NOPE” *Rips it.*

Some people are raised by women who worked at the chamber of commerce. Some are raised by women who worked for al-Qaeda. You can pretty easily tell the difference.

In my humble, haram-riddled opinion, as a mere half-brained woman, the greatest moment of the night came after the beat-down debate, when our glorious Commander in Chief signed into the chat. In a post on Truth Social, President Trump noted that Mohammad El-Sayed was “short on stature, patriotism, and truth.”

Taqiyya lies told? Zero. 

Maybe Rogers will win after all, wresting a blue seat from Democrats’ death grip, after that fabulous performance that proved, maybe, just maybe, it’s worth publicly negotiating and debating terrorists, if only to show how stupid they sound.