The decade's most triggering comedy
On Sunday, superstar Madonna, whose full name is Madonna Ciccone, posted a video of herself naked in a rose petal-infused bathtub talking about the China-originated novel coronavirus, or COVID-19.
Pushing a message of “no discrimination,” Madonna, 61, waxed poetic about globalism, suggesting the “wonderful” side of COVID-19 is the same as what’s “terrible” about it: that the virus is the “great equalizer” for all mankind.
“That’s the thing about COVID-19, it doesn’t care about how rich you are, how famous you are, how funny you are, how smart you are, where you live, how old you are, what amazing stories you can tell,” the “Material Girl” singer said. “It’s the great equalizer.”
“And what’s terrible about it is what’s great about it,” she continued. “What’s terrible about it is it’s made us all equal in many ways. And what’s wonderful about it is that it’s made us all equal in many ways.”
“Like I used to say, at the end of human nature every night, we’re all in the same boat,” she concluded. “And if the ship goes down, we’re all going down together.”
— Madonna (@Madonna) March 22, 2020
The video received some criticism online, as folks highlighted the disconnect between Madonna’s fancy bath and her message emphasizing that she’s just like everyone else.
Earlier this week, several celebrities teamed up for a similarly flavored “inspirational” coronavirus message, singing John Lennon’s “Imagine.”
Larry the Cable Guy, whose real name is Daniel Lawrence Whitney, hit the celebs:
“Here’s a message from people with a lot of possessions that can take a year off of work and not flinch telling everyone outa work to imagine a world with no possessions while people are living in the street a half mile away from ‘em,'” he wrote via Twitter. “They’re clueless.”
Here’s a message from people with a lot of possessions that can take a year off of work and not flinch telling everyone outa work to imagine a world with no possessions while people are living in the street a half mile away from ‘em. RT @MattWalshBlog:
— Larry The Cable Guy (@GitRDoneLarry) March 19, 2020
On Friday, Madonna posted another quarantine-style celebrity video, creating a parody song of her famed “Vogue” hit.
“Come on, go,” she sang. “Let’s go eat some fried fish. Fried Fish! Come on, vogue – I mean go! Let’s go eat some fried fish. Fried fish! ‘Cause there’s no more pasta, oh no! We’re gonna eat some fried fish! Fried fish! Yeah!”
“Living in Special Times…………thank GOD for imagination and fried fish!” the entertainer captioned the post.
— Madonna (@Madonna) March 20, 2020
This video, too, was lightly mocked. Parody king “Weird Al” Yankovic, for example, replied to the video on Saturday: “See? Not so easy, is it?”
See? Not so easy, is it? https://t.co/LY9Qha35RK
— Al Yankovic (@alyankovic) March 21, 2020
Another celebrity getting in on the quarantine attention craze was comedian and host Ellen DeGeneres. Superstars like Justin Timberlake, John Legend, and Chrissy Teigen were among the lucky ones to get a phone call from DeGeneres during their self-isolation. They mostly talked about how bored they were.
“I wish I had kids right now, I’m so bored,” DeGeneres told Legend and Teigen during one of her calls. “We’re bored too,” Legend told the host. “We’re super bored,” added his supermodel wife.
“Sounds like things are good over at [John Legend] and [Chrissy Teigen’s] house,” Degeneres captioned the Instagram post.
Podcast host Bridget Phetasy summed up: “I never realized exactly how much attention celebrities craved until they were locked up.”
I never realized exactly how much attention celebrities craved until they were locked up.
— Bridget Phetasy (@BridgetPhetasy) March 22, 2020