Merrick Garland Appoints Federal Prosecutor David Weiss To Oversee David Weiss

The Department of Justice has appointed Federal Prosecutor David Weiss as Special Counsel so he can oversee the botched Hunter Biden investigation run by Federal Prosecutor David Weiss. David Weiss’s meandering years-long investigation allowed the statute of limitations to run out on major charges against Hunter before resulting in a sweetheart plea deal that immediately imploded on cursory examination in court and now David Weiss has been assigned to oversee David Weiss to make sure David Weiss didn’t get up to some kind of funny business. Because Federal Prosecutor David Weiss is a federal employee answerable to Hunter’s father Joe Biden, DOJ regulations require the special counsel overseeing Federal Prosecutor David Weiss should be someone outside the federal government, like Federal Prosecutor David Weiss.

Attorney General Merrick “Joey Bananas” Garland says he appointed David Weiss to oversee David Weiss in hopes of restoring the public’s diminishing trust in the integrity of the DOJ through a blatantly cynical cover-up that will spit a phlegm-gob of unbridled power and corruption in the public’s eye thereby blinding them to the blatant cynicism, unbridled power and corruption that have diminished public trust in the DOJ.