Let’s face it, the stereotype that millennials are entitled, narcissistic, spoiled brats is pretty darn accurate. And if the anecdotal evidence from the local snobby brewista sporting a “F*** Capitalism” sticker on the back of his Apple iPhone which holds countless selfies isn’t enough for your liking, here’s some statistical proof provided via Time Magazine:
The incidence of narcissistic personality disorder is nearly three times as high for people in their 20s as for the generation that’s now 65 or older, according to the National Institutes of Health; 58% more college students scored higher on a narcissism scale in 2009 than in 1982. Millennials got so many participation trophies growing up that a recent study showed that 40% believe they should be promoted every two years, regardless of performance. They are fame-obsessed: three times as many middle school girls want to grow up to be a personal assistant to a famous person as want to be a Senator, according to a 2007 survey; four times as many would pick the assistant job over CEO of a major corporation. They’re so convinced of their own greatness that the National Study of Youth and Religion found the guiding morality of 60% of millennials in any situation is that they’ll just be able to feel what’s right. Their development is stunted: more people ages 18 to 29 live with their parents than with a spouse, according to the 2012 Clark University Poll of Emerging Adults. And they are lazy. In 1992, the nonprofit Families and Work Institute reported that 80% of people under 23 wanted to one day have a job with greater responsibility; 10 years later, only 60% did.
In a hilarious viral parody video released last month, called “Millennial International: Sponsor a Millennial Today,” creator John Crist perfectly captures the essence of the self-absorbed, entitled millennial generation. The video features an older gentleman discussing a new “revolutionizing” ministry he recently heard about through his church. As he discusses the “ministry” and his “sponsorship,” three brat millennial actors explain their dire situations, such as struggling to fund core-yoga classes and paying for food for a rescue dog.
As sappy music plays, the older actor opens the sketch: “I was at church one day, and the speaker that day was, uh, was different. I just sat there with tears in my eyes, learning about this ministry that was revolutionizing the planet, and I’m talking of course of Millennial International,” he says. “The need is enormous: There are over 10 million millennials out there who have graduated with no work ethic; no job; no discernable skills at all.”
“I’m a an aspiring photographer. I graduated college with an Art degree, so obviously, that puts me at a disadvantage,” says one millennial named Declan—the most millennial name ever.
“Am I capable of having a job? Sure,” says Declan. “I just feel like maybe employment right now would be stifling my creativity.”
The older man “sponsoring” Declan then reads a letter from the millennial: “He said that his weekend was, how’d he put it, ‘totes lit fam.’ I have no idea what that means,” he says.
“If it wasn’t for the program, I’d have to get a job—or worse, start a GoFundMe,” says the hipster millennial.
“Millennial International is a sponsor-based program designed to help Millennials live the lives they portray on Instagram,” reads the video’s caption.
God help us all.