Like A Swirling Toilet Bowl Of Mendacity, Woke Search Engine Says Men Can Menstruate

Right now would be a good time to Google the question: “Do men menstruate?,” if right now you happen to be drunk out of your mind, already wearing a lampshade on your head and quickly running out of other jokes to keep your friends in the hot tub giggling helplessly until you can find some quiet place in which to violently vomit and collapse into unconsciousness. Because as it turns out, if you Google the question, “Do men menstruate?” the first hilarious response Google will give you is this – and this is an exact quote: “Having a period is not a feminine thing, and people of all genders menstruate, including non-binary people, agender people and even plenty of men!”

Now I know what you’re thinking. You’re thinking, “Oh Klavan, you raucously rambunctious maestro of merriment, how did you invent this absurd scenario that makes it seem as if one of the most powerful corporations on earth is trying to drag the rest of us into a swirling toilet bowl of mendacity so that we’ll be ultimately flushed into the twisted plumbing of stupidity and spat out into the sewer of cultural lunacy?”