News and Commentary

James Woods Smacks ‘Utter Moron’ Bernie Sanders

James Woods is brilliant. With an IQ reported to be over 180, he is probably more intelligent than half of Hollywood – combined. While most celebrity starlets are snorting cocaine at the back of an exclusive lounge, this skillful actor is using his brainpower in pursuit of a noble cause: trashing socialist sycophant Bernie Sanders, the leftist messiah running on asurplus of stupidity. Just when we thought he was running out of steam, Sanders poked his head out again like a whack-a-mole ready to hammer.

First it was Denmark. Now it’s Communist China. Next thing you know, Sanders is going to shamelessly praise Sudan (see: Clock-kid). Clearly, Sanders was up after his bedtime. Things get a little loopy when he misses his naps and 5 am breakfasts. Against all odds, James Woods entered the scene, smacking Sanders back to IHOP:

For some reason, Sanders missed that part about female infanticide. The self-championed caretaker of the poor often forgets crucial details like that. As the number two Democrat in the primaries, Sanders has gleefully embraced European-style economic models while steadily rising in the polls. Not a single policy the man has proposed makes any sense whatsoever. Most of his statements are logically invalid. Others are entirely made-up.

“China has notoriously killed female infants for population control, you utter moron.”

James Woods

And still, the Democratic electorate celebrates the maladroit Marxist. Nonetheless, a large contingent of the Democratic electorate still ‘Feel the Bern.’ They would be wise to listen to James Woods; he makes far more sense than the Democratic Socialist/Independent/Democratic (?) Senator from Vermont. With the dexterity of a former MIT Political Science student, Woods commented on the collective cognitive dissonance of the Sanders’ campaign:

God Bless James Woods and God Bless the United States of America: