I get asked lots of questions about dating, so I’ve decided to answer a few of the most frequently asked. Dating is difficult, but it doesn’t have to be as difficult as people make it if you know what you’re looking for — and what you’re not.
Q: When should I start talking to my partner about marriage?
A: I may be the last person you should ask this question to — or, actually, maybe the first. I got engaged after two weeks. That’s right — we met and got engaged two weeks later. I don’t believe in wasting time. Modern “wisdom” will tell you to wait at least a couple years before even broaching the subject. But that’s two years of your life you’ll never get back, and no one’s getting any younger. If you want children, that’s something to pay attention to as well because if your end goal with a relationship is marriage and kids, you should feel confident talking about that right away. Talking about it doesn’t mean engagement, marriage, and kids needs to happen today, tomorrow, or the next day, but having the conversation will let you know if you’re dating someone who wants a serious relationship or if you’re dating someone who wants to Netflix and chill, as the kids say. Let your level of seriousness about marriage guide your answer.
Q: How did you know so soon with your husband?
A: Knowing my husband was the man I wanted to marry so soon was a bit of a weird experience. I honestly just looked at his face and knew I was going to marry him. It was the most bizarre thing in the entire world! Looking back, I’m not sure if I had seen his face in a dream, but seeing him was like seeing a puzzle come together. I thought, that’s my husband. No questions asked.
Q: What questions should you ask on a first date?
A: First, you should definitely figure out what they’re looking for. Most times, men will tell you the truth and be quite forthcoming about that. And even if they’re not honest to your face, their actions will be; they won’t text you after, say they had a nice time, or proactively make plans to see you again. That would let you know they’re just looking to play around. So, you should ask questions that give you answers you’re looking for. If you want a serious relationship, you should ask serious questions. Are you looking for a serious relationship? Are you looking to commit? Are you more interested in dating around? If you want something serious and they don’t, continuing to date them would be a total and utter waste of your time. Yes, this is contrary to what society says the position of the modern-day woman should be, but if you want something serious, there’s no reason at all for any woman in the modern age to stick around for a guy who does not.
Q: What was the worst piece of dating advice you received? Did you follow it?
A: Any advice with the attitude of dating just to have fun or only doing whatever you feel because “it totally doesn’t matter” is just wrong. It totally does matter. It actually matters. People, television, music, and society in general promote the idea that being a woman in the modern age means sleeping around to date. Contrary to what is promoted — that you won’t have any feelings — you will have feelings. Dating, cuddling, and hooking up are all experiences that inherently lead to having feelings. Oxytocin, the chemical released during these activities, is called the cuddle hormone for a reason. Being told you’ll just “outthink” it or that “it doesn’t matter” because you can just have a causal relationship with a guy is the worst piece of advice you can possibly give to a young woman. In the end, it just leads to heartbreak.
Where can I meet strong, conservative men?
Not Instagram! Be suspect of guys who are really invested in social media because constantly looking at advertisements of different women is simply not good. Men in the past seem to be so focused on building families while men today can swipe right like they’re purchasing a car. If you’re religious, you can find someone at church, and if you attend political events, you could find a fellow conservative at a conference. You’ll have the same thoughts and ideas, so if you’re interested in conservatism, do conservative activities and you’ll likely draw a conservative to yourself.
If you’re looking for a serious relationship, get serious about your dating. And be confident and comfortable doing so. There’s no reason not to be.
The views expressed in this opinion piece are the author’s own and do not necessarily represent those of The Daily Wire.