The decade's most triggering comedy
WARNING: Due to the subject matter, the following piece contains strong language.
A contingent of gay teenagers who are displeased with President-Elect Donald Trump’s recent victory are protesting by selling “p***y pops” as part of a fundraiser for Planned Parenthood. The vagina-shaped lollipops appear to reference Trump’s infamous “grab them by the p***sy” comment to Billy Bush–a statement used against the president-elect during the campaign.
For just $3.99, an anonymous LGBT- affiliated high school couple will deliver “an edible, flesh-colored vulva on a stick” to the Trump Headquarters in New York City on your behalf. Some vulvae are colored with lighter skin shades, while others have darker skin shades, presumably to remain racially inclusive.
In case your imagination didn’t serve an accurate image of what these sweets look like, here they are:
The anonymous teens created a website called “Send Trump P***y,” which offers a donate-link for their lollipop campaign, and outlines the reasons why they’ll be sending vagina lollipops to the president-elect.
Some of those reasons are that Trump is “wrong on pretty much every position,” that he is not a “decent human being,” that he is a “misogynistic pig” whose rhetoric oppresses “all the #NastyWomen,” and that he is “terrible at business.” Yup, this is coming from two young men whose business skills involve conning strangers of their money in order to allegedly support a baby-killing organization without so much as providing any evidence of their products to the public or even their names. Oh, and who literally can’t stand p***ies.
“We’re on a mission to show Trump and America that we’re unsatisfied, and our desire for an inclusive un-misogynistic America is unwavering, by sending him pussy-shaped lollipops,” the website reads.
Purchase options on the site include a “Buy Now!” link which sends website visitors directly to PayPal, while a “No thanks!” link sends visitors to another site called “Send D**ks to Donald.” Yup, that site works pretty much the same way the “Send Trump P***y” site works, just with penis pops instead of vagina pops, along with a printed message attached: “Eat a d**k, Donald Trump!”
Unlike the “d**k” site, the “p**y” site claims to forward 50% of its proceeds to Planned Parenthood and to what seems to be an attempt at feminism.
In an email to the College Fix, the high schoolers, who go by the names Jules and Gabe, say they are sending pops in the mold of vulvae “not only [to] show how strong these ‘anatomical features’ are, but also to take back the power.”
“P***ies have always been referred to as weak, things that women should be embarrassed about, and things that men should have power over, but honestly, the opposite is true,” they wrote. “They are one of the strongest anatomical features in humans [sic] bodies, and women should not only be proud of them, but we need to take control of them back.”
Yep, “we” as in two gender-normative homosexual men who neither own nor wish for female body parts. And yes, these young men are allegedly going to de-objectify women by placing replicas of their genitalia on sticks and sending them to the Trump headquarters.
“That way,” they wrote in an email to the Huffington Post, “he will really understand how important [the campaign] is and so he and his administration see how many people really believe in women representing their reproductive rights.”
But hear this: for all the talk about bringing back the power to women, Jules and Gabe do not seem to value female parts as much as they value male parts. In fact, buying a d**k pop ($4.99) for Trump will cost you a dollar more than buying a p***y pop ($3.99)!
Now that’s a sellout, don’t you think?
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