Feminists: Degrading ‘Rough Sex’ Where Women are Choked and Spat on is Empowering

On Tuesday, Mashable put its feminist hat on to send out another completely consistent and positive message to females by explaining that it’s empowering for women to engage in casual “feminist rough sex” where women are dominated, choked and spat on with whomever and how-many-ever people they so choose. (But don’t you dare call a woman “sweetheart,” you sexist pig!)

“Slapping, choking, spitting—if a woman gets off on a little consensual degradation in the bedroom, does that make her less of a feminist?” begins the piece. This question is soon answered with the obvious: Of course not! It actually makes you empowered.

Susan B. Anthony would be proud. Well, in fairness, the men do clean up the spit after they degrade you, so…

But back to the serious matter of women advocating for degrading and damaging practices for other women, Mashable maintains the position that sex should have no restrictions whatsoever; it should be with whomever you want, whenever you want, and apparently with no commitment necessary.

“For the record, the dominant partner(s) needn’t be male in these scenarios. Nor does rough sex necessarily imply penis-vagina intercourse,” states Mashable. “Feminist women can and do experiment with power structures well beyond male-female play.”

Per Mashable, feminism is all about “choice” and “autonomy,” therefore choosing to sleep around and engage in potentially harmful behavior (increased risk of unplanned pregnancy with subsequent financial troubles, STDs, depression, etc.) is not only pro-feminist and empowering, but it must be pushed to the masses.

Feminist disclaimer: Choosing to stay at home and raise your child/children doesn’t count. In that case you’re not empowered at all, but actually an anti-feminist with harbored internalized misogyny.

One feminist, “Zoe,” explains that she likes to get spat on—“the nastier the better”—during sex. Eventually, this is deemed empowering because after all, as mentioned above, the man cleans up the spit afterward.

“I love being spat on during sex,” says Zoe, a 28-year-old graduate student I’m sipping espressos with. “The nastier the spit, the better. Does that make me a bad feminist? Do I need to burn all of my Audre Lorde books? Give back my Smith College degree?” She tosses aside a lock of hair as she laughs at the ridiculousness of her own rhetorical questions. I wonder how many times she’s caught a loogie.

***

“So who cleans up the spit?” I ask Zoe at the end of our chat. “He does, of course!” she scoffs. Aftercare, a term coined by the BDSM community, refers to the routine done (usually by the person in the dominant role) in service of the person in the receiving/submissive role once rough sex or play has ended.

Mashable gives the explanation that “[f]eminist rough sex empowers” solely because of the consent involved.

“A woman receiving roughness has given you permission to dominate her on whatever terms she’s laid out…That’s power, in fact, arguably more power than the giver. Throughout all roughness, the woman is in power, even if she has chosen to relinquish it.”

Of course, generally speaking, doing as you choose sexually is in fact a form of freedom. This is not the issue. But promoting degrading and potentially harmful behavior on the pretense of female empowerment is truly absurd and inconsistent. In this case, once again, we see modern feminists extremely motivated to push the false narrative that sleeping around is healthy, pro-feminist, and all-in-all good behavior for women. Apparently now, being degraded, choked and spat on in the process is super empowering too.