The following is an adapted excerpt taken from “You’re Not Alone: The Conservative Woman’s Guide to College,” by Karin A. Lips, (Network of enlightened Women, January 2023)
Living With Social Pressure, Silencing, And Censorship
After the Dobbs v. Jackson Women’s Health Organization majority opinion on abortion was leaked, first-year Yale Law School student Shyamala Ramakrishna posted to Instagram that “the members of [Yale Law School’s conservative Federalist Society] are conspirators in the Christo-fascist political takeover we all seem to be posting frantically about on Instagram dot com.” She continued, “So why are they still coming to our parties/laughing in the library…with precious few social consequences and without unrelenting daily confrontation?”
“Social consequences” and “daily confrontation.” This student at one of the best law schools in the country, according to the U.S. News and World Report list of best law schools, called for her peers to be socially ostracized and harassed — simply because they were part of the Federalist Society, a group made up of conservative and libertarian law students, lawyers, and scholars.
While this example is from law school, this attitude toward conservatives is present on undergraduate campuses, too. To many of their liberal classmates, conservative students aren’t just peers with different views. Instead, conservative students are outcasts, treated as a threat that must be silenced or removed from social spaces.
This attitude creates social pressure for conservatives to keep their views quiet (or even change their views!) and self-censor. While some students self-censor because of concern over grades, others worry about how their views will impact their social life. When the campus environment sends the message that conservative views aren’t welcome, this creates a strong incentive for conservatives to go underground with their views.
This silencing pressure is bad for everyone on campus as they lose a valuable learning experience. Kristi Noem, Governor of South Dakota, wrote, “I often tell young people one of the best things they can do is decide to be a teachable person. You can learn something from everyone, even your worst critic.” The silencing pressure is bad for conservatives who don’t get to share their views, so they don’t get the chance to further refine them or find friends with similar views. It is also bad for liberals who don’t get the chance to listen to other points of view and be challenged by them. When I was in school, I remember attending events featuring liberal speakers. I’d hear other people ask what I thought were tough questions or ask my own. The speaker would often win those little exchanges, but learning to engage with the other side and being challenged to think in a more nuanced way was good for me. These exchanges improved my critical thinking skills. And it is bad for society for the next generation of leaders not to know how to have civil discussions or even coexist in a friendly way.
Here are some things you should know about the stifling atmosphere that could be present on your campus.
Self-Censoring Is Real (Especially For Conservatives)
One signal of the social pressure on young conservatives on campus is the extent to which they self-censor or remain silent. A report from the Knight Foundation found that 65% of students said they believed their campus climate “prevents some people from saying things they believe because others might find it offensive.” According to the 2022-2023 College Free Speech Rankings published by the Foundation for Individual Rights and Expression (FIRE), a nonprofit organization dedicated to defending free speech and free thought, 63% of students responded that they self-censor because they “worried about damaging their reputation because of someone misunderstanding something they have said or done.” Among the students surveyed, 22% said they “often felt that they cannot express their opinion on a subject because of how students, a professor, or the administration would respond.” There is a big difference between conservative and liberal students — 42% of conservative students said they self-censor compared to 23% of moderate students and only 13% of liberal students.
Social Pressure Shows Up In Different Places And Ways
You might face social pressure anywhere on campus, even in your own dorm room. In 2018, NeW published a book, “She’s Conservative: Stories of Trials and Triumphs on America’s College Campuses,” which shared the stories of twenty-two young women on what it is like to be conservative in college. One of the themes that emerged from that book is that many of the women decided to keep their views quiet on campus because of the fear they wouldn’t be able to make friends.
Grace Bannister, a Harvard student from West Virginia, said she was “paired with a roommate whose worldview was drastically different than” hers for her freshman year. Grace wrote, “My new friend characterized herself as a ‘woke’ feminist. For the first few weeks, we got along rather well. I worried that this would change if we ever talked politics, so for a time, I avoided it.”
While Grace didn’t lead off the dynamic with her conservative views, talking about opinions on issues is natural with your roommate. When Grace finally couldn’t avoid political topics any longer, she shared that she was a conservative. Her roommate dismissed Grace’s views due to her “background,” citing her upbringing in West Virginia. I can imagine the pressure Grace felt to stay silent in even casual conversations with her new roommate.
Use The Power Of Persuasion
Over the years, I have heard lots of speeches on different issues. The most memorable ones employed techniques of persuasion. These techniques can be used in everyday conversations and may make the difference between a civil conversation and social ostracization. I have found that stating clearly that I am supporting a certain position to help people is an effective strategy. While I was in college, I remember the living wage was a hot topic.
I heard a speaker make the case that the living wage, or a higher minimum wage, can end up hurting the people that it supposedly goes to help. It does this by making it more expensive for companies to hire people, so they expect their employees to have more skills even at the lowest levels. Thus, the companies hire fewer entry-level employees without experience. Instead of those employees getting paid more, they never get a job to start with. A higher minimum wage also invites companies to turn to automation, eliminating some jobs entirely. In the fast-food industry, for example, some companies have moved to kiosks or other automation to lower their labor costs when labor costs rise, such as when states raise the minimum wage.
The speaker won over audience members not by talking about how raising the minimum wage hurt companies by making labor more expensive, but by arguing that it hurt entry-level employees as there would be fewer opportunities for them. The speaker focused on people, which is often an effective strategy for winning an argument.
It’s Okay To Lose Friends — They Weren’t Your Real Friends Anyway
Lila Fraser, from Mercer University, shared her experience, “My social life has been impacted by my conservative beliefs. At first, my biggest struggle was losing friends. I lost a few friends in high school, and again when I started college after they found out I was a conservative. However, as I became more confident in my beliefs and found some like-minded friends, I treasured my true friends who stood by me. Over the last couple of years, I have struggled mostly with coworkers and members of my professional fraternity, who put me into a box when they discovered I was a conservative.”
Many of the students I work with lose some friendships, but they also make great new friends. Ariana Alonso, a student at William Paterson University, sums up the situation well. “I wear my conservative shirts, sweatshirts, etc. with pride. I love what I believe in, and if my friends can’t accept that, they are not real, true friends. Surround yourself with people who are going to be there and are going to support you. Let the negativity run off your shoulders and keep being yourself.”
Accept that some people won’t pursue a friendship because of your views. I have heard several stories like Lila’s from our leaders about losing friends. It was hard for her at first, but she agreed she was better off in the end.
By getting involved in conservative causes, they found a community that made them much happier, and they no longer felt lonely. Not only did they enjoy their time with these friends, but it’s harder to pick on someone when they are part of a strong community. And common values are a good foundation for lasting friendships.
If you are an outspoken conservative, you have likely experienced some social pressure before and found ways to thrive. Even with this pressure, you can have an amazing college experience.
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Karin A. Lips is the Founder and President of the Network of enlightened Women (NeW) and author of You’re Not Alone: The Conservative Woman’s Guide to College. She is a graduate of the University of Virginia and the University of Virginia School of Law and practiced law at Wiley Rein LLP. She was a Spring 2016 Resident Fellow at the Harvard Institute of Politics. You can follow her on Instagram at @karin.lips and X/Twitter at @klips.
This is an adapted excerpt from “You’re Not Alone: The Conservative Woman’s Guide to College,” by Karin A. Lips. Copyright © 2023 NETWORK OF ENLIGHTENED WOMEN. Reprinted by permission.
The views expressed in this piece are those of the author and do not necessarily represent those of the Daily Wire.