The New York Times, a former newspaper, recently ran a story with this headline: “Men, Where Have You Gone? Please Come Back.” The sub-headline was: “So many men have retreated from intimacy, hiding behind firewalls, filters and curated personas, dabbling and scrolling. We miss you.”
Now, I know what you’re thinking. You’re thinking, “Oh, Klavan, you smoking hot hunk of hilarity, a joke is a joke, but do you really expect us to believe that that was a headline in the same former newspaper that has spent the last forty years denigrating men and marriage and promoting a sexual culture of such degrading perversion that it could only be intended to cause even a fully operational male to recoil horrified from sexual communion as if he were Ben Affleck in the moment he suddenly realized he had left the really nice Jennifer for the Jennifer with the admittedly spectacular body but with the kind of personality that could make even a fully operational male recoil horrified from sexual communion as if he’d spent the last forty years reading the New York Times?&#8221; And okay, sure, even I’ve forgotten where that sentence began, but the point is, no, I’m not making this up.
This article wondering why men had retreated from intimacy into a world of solitary stimulation utterly devoid of emotional content was written by Rachel Drucker, a woman who spent part of her career working for Playboy and its affiliated hard core porn outlets, enticing men to retreat from intimacy into a world of solitary stimulation utterly devoid of emotional content. She writes (and this is a real quote, I’m still not even making stuff up yet): “I remember when part of heterosexual male culture involved showing up with a woman to signal something — status, success, desirability. Women were once signifiers of value, even to other men. That dynamic has quietly collapsed.”
So — baffled by this mystery — the New York Times did what they usually do in such circumstances: they sent their reporters to find out what men think, by interviewing women.
<h3><a href="https://www.dailywire.com/show/the-andrew-klavan-show">WATCH: The Andrew Klavan Show</a></h3>
For instance, they spoke with Karen Screamy-Hate-Face, President of the Society for Harridans who are Intolerably Loud, or S-H-R-I-L. Ms. Screamy-Hate-Face said, “I can’t for the life of me figure out why I can’t get a date with one of these toxic snakes. I’ve got the pink hat, all the right tattoos and plenty of insight on how to make men be better than they are. What do those bastards want from me? Tenderness?”
The Times also interviewed the holder of the Guinness Book World Record for highest body count, Karen Spikenose, who told them, “Frankly, I think most men are just too sexually insecure. They’re always afraid I’m going to compare them to all the men I slept with yesterday. But really, I’m the sort of girl who usually takes each man separately. It’s more time-consuming, but I feel it makes for a more intimate seven minutes.”
And they interviewed divorce attorney Karen Crotchfangs, who told us, “I just think men don’t know what they really want. They say they want a feminine girl like me who gets all made up for a date and wears pretty dresses and lets them pay for dinner, but then the minute they see my penis they run for the hills. Sometimes without even finishing their drink.”
In the end, however, despite its considerable reportorial power, the New York Times somehow could not solve the mystery of why men no longer feel that women add value to their lives.
Now, part of our job here at the Daily Wire is to bring you the kind of material that outlets like the New York Times simply can’t provide. Like journalism. So we immediately sent our reporters out into the field, and when they didn’t come back from the field but simply went prancing off across the grass picking flowers and weaving garlands of daisies for one another’s heads, we sent out some more reporters to interview a prominent man on why he had retreated from intimacy. Unfortunately, the man just kept sobbing violently and crying out, “What was I thinking? I could have had the nice Jennifer!”
* * *
This excerpt is taken from the opening satirical monologue of “<a href="https://www.dailywire.com/show/the-andrew-klavan-show" target="_blank" rel="noopener">The Andrew Klavan Show</a>.”
Andrew Klavan is the host of “The Andrew Klavan Show” at The Daily Wire. Klavan is the bestselling author of numerous books, including the Cameron Winter Mystery series. The fourth installment, “<a href="https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/1613165536?ref_=dbs_m_mng_rwt_calw_thcv_3&amp;storeType=ebooks" target="_blank" rel="noopener">A Woman Underground.</a>” His most recent nonfiction release is “<a href="https://www.amazon.com/Kingdom-Cain-Finding-Literature-Darkness/dp/0310368340/?_encoding=UTF8&amp;pd_rd_w=nMYjR&amp;content-id=amzn1.sym.bc3ba8d1-5076-4ab7-9ba8-a5c6211e002d&amp;pf_rd_p=bc3ba8d1-5076-4ab7-9ba8-a5c6211e002d&amp;pf_rd_r=133-8344803-2786917&amp;pd_rd_wg=7a8J3&amp;pd_rd_r=5791ea0f-6d96-4732-9d6a-3a4e6b348bb5&amp;ref_=aufs_ap_sc_dsk" target="_blank" rel="noopener">The Kingdom of Cain: Finding God in the Literature of Darkness.</a>” (May 2025, Zondervan/HarperCollins). Follow him on X: <a href="https://x.com/andrewklavan" target="_blank" rel="noopener">@andrewklavan</a>
The views expressed in this satirical article are those of the author and do not necessarily represent those of The Daily Wire.

Man sitting under the table and using mobile phone.

New York Times Investigates Retreat Of Men By Talking To Women

Andrew Klavan

Gen Z

Humor

New York Times

Relationships

Satire

Women

The following article was originally posted on &#8220;<a href="https://thenewjerusalem.substack.com/?utm_source=substack&amp;utm_medium=email">The New Jerusalem</a>&#8221; on Substack.
* * *
Once, when I was young, I told a girl, “You can’t solve your problems until you stop being proud of them.” In general, this is a terrible thing to say to a woman. As a sex, women tend to hold their problems very dear and view any attempt at a solution as a domineering masculine intrusion. In this particular case, however, I had chosen my moment, and the girl married me. Which, come to think of it, may have proved my point.
More seriously, though, there is nothing people hold onto so tightly as their worst behaviors, and nothing more useless than telling them to stop doing the thing that hurts them most. In my 2009 novel “Empire of Lies,” the protagonist reflects on friends who have headed down The Road to Disaster.
<blockquote>“Sometimes it even happened that these friends… would come to [my wife] Cathy and me… and ask us for our advice. ‘We are heading down the Road to Disaster,’ they would say. ‘What can we do to avoid the Disaster at the end?’ And Cathy and I would answer, ‘Stop. Stop going down that road. Stop cheating on your wife or spending too much money or neglecting your children or drinking. Turn around and go back and go down another road instead.’ And every time—every single time—they would say to us, ‘Oh, no. Oh, no, we can’t do that… We have many good and sound and necessary reasons why we must go down the Road to Disaster. Therefore give us some other advice. Give us some advice that will make the Road to Disaster end somewhere other than in the Disaster to which it inevitably leads.’”</blockquote>
<div id="attachment_939277" style="width: 394px" class="wp-caption aligncenter"><img loading="lazy" decoding="async" aria-describedby="caption-attachment-939277" class="size-large wp-image-939277" src="https://dw-wp-production.imgix.net/2025/06/MixCollage-24-Jun-2025-02-33-PM-2532-384x576.jpg" alt="“Road to Morrocco.” 1942. Bing Crosby, Bob Hope, Dorothy Lamour. Paramount Pictures." width="384" height="576" srcset="https://dw-wp-production.imgix.net/2025/06/MixCollage-24-Jun-2025-02-33-PM-2532-384x576.jpg 384w, https://dw-wp-production.imgix.net/2025/06/MixCollage-24-Jun-2025-02-33-PM-2532-200x300.jpg 200w, https://dw-wp-production.imgix.net/2025/06/MixCollage-24-Jun-2025-02-33-PM-2532-768x1152.jpg 768w, https://dw-wp-production.imgix.net/2025/06/MixCollage-24-Jun-2025-02-33-PM-2532-1024x1536.jpg 1024w, https://dw-wp-production.imgix.net/2025/06/MixCollage-24-Jun-2025-02-33-PM-2532-1365x2048.jpg 1365w, https://dw-wp-production.imgix.net/2025/06/MixCollage-24-Jun-2025-02-33-PM-2532-1360x2040.jpg 1360w, https://dw-wp-production.imgix.net/2025/06/MixCollage-24-Jun-2025-02-33-PM-2532-scaled.jpg 1707w" sizes="(max-width: 384px) 100vw, 384px" />Paramount Pictures. 1942. IMDB.</div>
This isn’t just true of individuals, whole nations do the same. World War I is the perfect example. &#8220;On or around December 1910, human character changed,” wrote Virginia Woolf. She was referring, with hyperbolic exactitude, to the onset of modernism in the arts. When one looks at the dissolution of realism and metaphysical certainties in the writings of Nietzsche or the paintings of Munch and Picasso, when one reflects on how art expresses the spirit of the age, it should have been almost obvious that Europe would soon begin the thirty years of self-annihilation that transformed it from the greatest culture that had ever existed on Earth to the hollow corpse we see being devoured by Islamists today.
And yet European leaders leapt to that death in 1914 and waited passively for it in the 1930’s, as if no other course were open to them.
My own stumble into political commentary was spurred, not by my commitment to one kind of politics over another, but by my observation that one side had gone palpably insane with self-hatred. What I don’t know, what I guess we’ll find out, is whether this was just the philosophical expression of a fatal organic decline, or a purposeful turn down the Road to Disaster from which we yet might turn away.
* * *
This article was originally posted on &#8220;<a href="https://thenewjerusalem.substack.com/?utm_source=substack&amp;utm_medium=email">The New Jerusalem</a>&#8221; on Substack.
Andrew Klavan is the host of “The Andrew Klavan Show” at The Daily Wire. Klavan is the bestselling author of numerous books, including the Cameron Winter Mystery series. The fourth installment, “<a href="https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/1613165536?ref_=dbs_m_mng_rwt_calw_thcv_3&amp;storeType=ebooks" target="_blank" rel="noopener">A Woman Underground.</a>” His most recent nonfiction release is “<a href="https://www.amazon.com/Kingdom-Cain-Finding-Literature-Darkness/dp/0310368340/?_encoding=UTF8&amp;pd_rd_w=nMYjR&amp;content-id=amzn1.sym.bc3ba8d1-5076-4ab7-9ba8-a5c6211e002d&amp;pf_rd_p=bc3ba8d1-5076-4ab7-9ba8-a5c6211e002d&amp;pf_rd_r=133-8344803-2786917&amp;pd_rd_wg=7a8J3&amp;pd_rd_r=5791ea0f-6d96-4732-9d6a-3a4e6b348bb5&amp;ref_=aufs_ap_sc_dsk" target="_blank" rel="noopener">The Kingdom of Cain: Finding God in the Literature of Darkness.</a>” (May 2025, Zondervan/HarperCollins). Follow him on X: <a href="https://x.com/andrewklavan" target="_blank" rel="noopener">@andrewklavan</a>
The views expressed in this article are those of the author and do not necessarily represent those of The Daily Wire.

MixCollage-25-Jun-2025-12-58-PM-5405

The Road To Disaster

Opinion

Psychology

Social Issues

Democrats and other misprints in the Book of Life are celebrating a rare victory after a weekend of “No Kings” protests resulted in there being no American kings.
The Democrat comeback ended a frustrating period of months in which party officials sought for some way to convince the American electorate that they were not just hollow glove puppets being manipulated by the sinister unseen hands of Communists and jihadis, while still remaining true to their goal of being hollow glove puppets manipulated by the sinister unseen hands of Communists and jihadis.
The turnaround came after Chairman of the Democrat National Committee, Abaddon Pazuzu, delivered a rousing and inspiring speech to the golden statue of a goat-headed god, saying, “Oh Lord of Darkness, come to our aid so that we may know we haven’t traded away our souls in vain. We have sought to win back the love of the American people by setting their cities on fire, interfering with their law enforcement officers in the rightful performance of their duties, mutilating their children, persecuting their politicians, silencing their opinions, dividing them into hostile camps according to their various races, and shutting their churches and synagogues while simultaneously cheering on acts of Islamist terror so horrifying in their apocalyptic evil we thought they’d be sure to win at least as loyal a following as Nancy Pelosi. And yet somehow, nothing we’ve done has managed to recapture the affection of the nation we’re trying so desperately to destroy. Guide our steps to success, oh unholy one, so that we might raise our approval ratings, which are in double digits only when expressed as fractions.”
Shortly after this address, the DNC staged the nationwide &#8220;No Kings&#8221; protests, which were so successful even the protesters themselves were amazed. As one 80-year-old wearing the rags of what used to be a Woodstock t-shirt wrote in his leatherette-bound diary, “I was beginning to worry I had wasted my life supporting delusional policies that promised utopia but instead turned everything they touched to crap. But now, in a single weekend, our protests managed to reduce Donald Trump from a mighty king to nothing but the President of the United States, leader of the free world and commander-in-chief of the most lethal fighting force on earth. I feel my dreams have become a reality for the first time since we put an end to all wars by ushering in the Age of Aquarius.”
<h3><a href="https://www.dailywire.com/show/the-andrew-klavan-show">WATCH: The Andrew Klavan Show</a></h3>
Left-Wing Activist Bruce Flapjaw, president of the Enlightened Institute of Endemic Imaginary Outrages — or E-I-E-I-O — celebrated the victory with a jubilant press release, saying “With the geriatric Trump forming a far-right monarchy in network newscasts and other fantasies, we were able to mobilize thousands of know-nothing political quacks, geriatric white women in mu-mus, and ivy league educated dumb-clucks until, with a mu-mu here and a mu-mu there, here a quack, there a quack, everywhere a dumb-cluck, old man Donald’s far-right form was expelled by the E-I-E-I-O.”
The Democrats mean to follow up their triumph later in the summer with a nationwide series of &#8220;No Alchemist&#8221; protests, pledging that they will not relent until they have rid the nation of every long-bearded man in a conical starry cap who is trying to turn lead into gold.
Excited by the success of the Democrats in expelling the kings from the U.S., Right-Wing anti-semites plan to follow suit, staging their own protests against imaginary outrages by declaring they will not die for Israel. The Groypers say they plan to illustrate their protest signs with pictures of doughty Christian knights to show what a brave and noble thing it is not to do what no one is asking them to do but what they would eventually have to do if the Jews weren’t currently doing it for them. After the “I Will Not Die for Israel” marches, the Groypers plan to gather to celebrate the triumphant fact that not one of them has died for Israel, marking the accomplishment by unleashing a barrage of social media posts, spelling the word Jew with two o’s to proclaim to all the world that they don’t know how to spell the word Jew.
* * *
This excerpt is taken from the opening satirical monologue of “<a href="https://www.dailywire.com/show/the-andrew-klavan-show" target="_blank" rel="noopener">The Andrew Klavan Show</a>.”
The views expressed in this satirical article are those of the author and do not necessarily represent those of The Daily Wire.
Andrew Klavan is the host of “The Andrew Klavan Show” at The Daily Wire. Follow him on X: <a href="https://x.com/andrewklavan" target="_blank" rel="noopener">@andrewklavan</a>
Klavan is the bestselling author of numerous books, including the Cameron Winter Mystery series. The fourth installment, “<a href="https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/1613165536?ref_=dbs_m_mng_rwt_calw_thcv_3&amp;storeType=ebooks" target="_blank" rel="noopener">A Woman Underground.</a>” His most recent nonfiction release is “<a href="https://www.amazon.com/Kingdom-Cain-Finding-Literature-Darkness/dp/0310368340/?_encoding=UTF8&amp;pd_rd_w=nMYjR&amp;content-id=amzn1.sym.bc3ba8d1-5076-4ab7-9ba8-a5c6211e002d&amp;pf_rd_p=bc3ba8d1-5076-4ab7-9ba8-a5c6211e002d&amp;pf_rd_r=133-8344803-2786917&amp;pd_rd_wg=7a8J3&amp;pd_rd_r=5791ea0f-6d96-4732-9d6a-3a4e6b348bb5&amp;ref_=aufs_ap_sc_dsk" target="_blank" rel="noopener">The Kingdom of Cain: Finding God in the Literature of Darkness.</a>” (May 2025, Zondervan/HarperCollins).

Anti-Trump “No Kings” Protests Pop Up Across The Country

‘No Kings’ Protests Result In No Kings

'No Kings' Protests Result In No Kings

Democrats

Los Angeles

Protests

Riots

You know, sometimes, in the hurly burly argle bargle mumbo jumbo of divisive political discourse, it becomes too easy for us to stop listening to the arguments of our opponents. Remember: we all want to see America thrive, and THEY all want to see America particlized in a self-aggrandizing orgy of violent destruction, then set on fire to destroy even the remaining traces of the personal liberty and prosperity we once spread not only from sea to shining sea but all around the world, so they can sweep away our flawed but magnificent nation and replace it with a socialist paradise that will quickly devolve into the hell of oppression and terror that has been the fate of every other socialist paradise while their misbegotten, ignorant and self-deceiving idealism slowly reveals itself to be nothing more than a ravenous hunger for power with its attendant sadistic cruelties.
But for a moment, let’s put those minor differences between us aside and see if we can try to understand our friends on the Left so we can begin to appreciate the goals and ideas that have turned them into such flaming dirt-bags.
For instance, take the riots in Los Angeles. They began when some Immigration and Customs Enforcement officers tried to arrest a number of illegal migrants for the purposes of deportation. Now sure, you could say the migrants had broken federal laws and the ICE agents are duly appointed federal law enforcement officers, working to roll back the slow-motion invasion of our country by unvetted illegals that took place during an administration run by sinister and faceless leftist operatives hiding behind the mindless shell of a once-sentient machine politician who had been propped up for half a century by an unimaginably corrupt corporate news media.
<h3><a href="https://www.dailywire.com/show/the-andrew-klavan-show">WATCH: The Andrew Klavan Show</a></h3>
But let’s look at the other side of the argument. We can’t just go around randomly sending child molesters and drug dealers back to their native countries. These are jobs Americans won’t do because they’re largely civilized people. And who will mow our lawns in order to weasel their way into our confidence and get closer to our children? You don’t want an untidy lawn, do you? And when you think of it in that larger context, you can see why masked thugs are pelting federal officers with rocks and torching cars and looting businesses while waving foreign flags to signal the fact they want to destroy the last best hope of civilization and replace it with whatever gangster-ocracy they just escaped from.
Now some of you might ask: who in the world would believe a crazy-ass argument like that?  But let me ask you something: Did you know that 56% of young liberal white women have been treated for mental illness. Think about that the next time one of these ladies posts her support for the rioters. See, when you first hear that most liberal white girls are mentally ill, you probably think the mental illness is just something a little neurotic like when they won’t let you pay for dinner but then sleep with you anyway. But no, it turns out that talking to some of these dames is more like being trapped in Arkham Asylum desperately trying to escape from a shrieking Admiral Levine who’s coming after you with one of those emasculators they use to castrate bulls, and then just as you lock yourself in an abandoned broom closet and think you’ve escaped him or her or whatever the hell he is, you turn around and there’s some 21-year-old from UCLA screaming “globalize the intifada” and voting for Gavin Newsom, and just as you think you’re done for, you wake up in your own bed and whisper, “Oh thank God, it was only a dream,” and then roll over and, holy crap, she’s lying right next to you. And you didn’t even pay for dinner. And also Los Angeles is on fire.
So now that we understand that these riots have the full and enthusiastic support of young leftist white women shrieking at us unintelligibly from whatever enclave of privilege has made it possible for them to believe the nutty crap they believe, I think we can begin to have more civilized and serious conversations about providing air support to the National Guard.
* * *
This excerpt is taken from the opening satirical monologue of “<a href="https://www.dailywire.com/show/the-andrew-klavan-show" target="_blank" rel="noopener">The Andrew Klavan Show</a>.”
The views expressed in this satirical article are those of the author and do not necessarily represent those of The Daily Wire.
Andrew Klavan is the host of “The Andrew Klavan Show” at The Daily Wire. Follow him on X: <a href="https://x.com/andrewklavan" target="_blank" rel="noopener">@andrewklavan</a>
Klavan is the bestselling author of numerous books, including the Cameron Winter Mystery series. The fourth installment, “<a href="https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/1613165536?ref_=dbs_m_mng_rwt_calw_thcv_3&amp;storeType=ebooks" target="_blank" rel="noopener">A Woman Underground.</a>” His most recent nonfiction release is “<a href="https://www.amazon.com/Kingdom-Cain-Finding-Literature-Darkness/dp/0310368340/?_encoding=UTF8&amp;pd_rd_w=nMYjR&amp;content-id=amzn1.sym.bc3ba8d1-5076-4ab7-9ba8-a5c6211e002d&amp;pf_rd_p=bc3ba8d1-5076-4ab7-9ba8-a5c6211e002d&amp;pf_rd_r=133-8344803-2786917&amp;pd_rd_wg=7a8J3&amp;pd_rd_r=5791ea0f-6d96-4732-9d6a-3a4e6b348bb5&amp;ref_=aufs_ap_sc_dsk" target="_blank" rel="noopener">The Kingdom of Cain: Finding God in the Literature of Darkness.</a>” (May 2025, Zondervan/HarperCollins).

US-POLITICS-IMMIGRATION

This Riot Is Brought To You By Shrieking Young Leftist White Women

Hollywood

Leftists

Liberals

Whites

Today is June 6. It was on this day, eighty-one years ago, that 150-thousand men from the United States, Great Britain, and other allied nations, landed under withering gunfire on the beaches of France to begin the brutal process of breaking the Nazi stranglehold on the once-free nations of Europe. It is difficult now to imagine the almost superhuman courage it required for these men to slog through the bullet-riddled surf onto beaches carpeted with the bodies of those who went before them, in order to fight their way inch by bloody inch into the maw of gun emplacements, the destruction of which represented only the first small step toward eradicating the most murderous regime ever to stain the annals of human history. 
And that’s why, every June, we dedicate the entire month to celebrating homosexuality. Well, maybe that’s not why. But there must be some reason. Because that’s what we do.
That’s right, it’s Pride Month, and there is absolutely nothing Americans can be so proud of as homosexuality … apparently. Just think of the progress gay people have made. Homosexuality — once called the love that dare not speak its name — is now, at last, the love that simply will not shut the hell up. It just drones on and on and on. It’s so great. Really, you can’t get enough of it. On and on and on and on. A whole month of it. I mean, most sexual abnormalities, you just politely look away and try to mind your own business. But there’s no chance of that with this one, is there? Nosiree. On and on and on. That’s progress.
And there’s so much progress to be proud of in Pride Month. In the past, for instance, a gay man had to hide in shame. Now he can march down the street in a pride parade, dressed in leather chaps that open behind to expose his buttocks not only to anyone who’s interested but to the many, many, many people who really are not interested in seeing his buttocks even a little bit. Plus he can carry a whip to announce to all the world that he has a trauma-induced sexual fetish that prevents him from having any relationship that isn’t centered on debasement, domination and pain. Then he can proclaim how proud he is about that. Then he can go home and wash down a fistful of anti-depressants with half a bottle of gin and scream “I’m so effing proud,” before pitching face forward onto the kitchen table and sinking into blessed unconsciousness.
<h3><a href="https://www.dailywire.com/show/the-andrew-klavan-show" target="_blank" rel="noopener">WATCH: The Andrew Klavan Show</a></h3>
And that’s not even all the progress. Some of you younger people won’t believe this, but it used to be that if a man punched a woman in the face, he’d be arrested. Today, thanks to the LGBTQ movement, if a man wants to punch a woman in the face, he can go to the Olympics and win a gold medal. I was so excited to hear this, I told my wife: I could punch you in the face and win a gold medal! My ex-wife, I should say. Still, it was a great moment.
And there’s even more progress. It used to be, if a man gave homosexual porn to a child, he’d be put in prison. Then he’d be killed by the other prisoners, because no matter how bad their crimes were, they weren’t as bad as giving homosexual porn to a child. Now, thanks to our pride, if a man gives homosexual porn to a child, it’s because he’s a member of a teachers union and has a job in a public elementary school. And man, if that’s not progress, then progress is probably something else. Like progress might be inventing air conditioning or computers or more effective treatments for disease. But no. For us, progress is teachers giving homosexual porn to children.
So this June, think back on that D-Day when thousands gave their lives for freedom. Remember it’s because of them that we can spend the entire month being proud of homosexuality. Because of them, and because our elite culture has become a cesspit of decadent buffoons who have no shame. After all, who else could be this proud?
* * *
This excerpt is taken from the opening satirical monologue of “<a href="https://www.dailywire.com/show/the-andrew-klavan-show" target="_blank" rel="noopener">The Andrew Klavan Show</a>.”
The views expressed in this satirical article are those of the author and do not necessarily represent those of The Daily Wire.
Andrew Klavan is the host of “The Andrew Klavan Show” at The Daily Wire. Follow him on X: <a href="https://x.com/andrewklavan" target="_blank" rel="noopener">@andrewklavan</a>
Klavan is the bestselling author of numerous books, including the Cameron Winter Mystery series. The fourth installment, “<a href="https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/1613165536?ref_=dbs_m_mng_rwt_calw_thcv_3&amp;storeType=ebooks" target="_blank" rel="noopener">A Woman Underground.</a>” His most recent nonfiction release is “<a href="https://www.amazon.com/Kingdom-Cain-Finding-Literature-Darkness/dp/0310368340/?_encoding=UTF8&amp;pd_rd_w=nMYjR&amp;content-id=amzn1.sym.bc3ba8d1-5076-4ab7-9ba8-a5c6211e002d&amp;pf_rd_p=bc3ba8d1-5076-4ab7-9ba8-a5c6211e002d&amp;pf_rd_r=133-8344803-2786917&amp;pd_rd_wg=7a8J3&amp;pd_rd_r=5791ea0f-6d96-4732-9d6a-3a4e6b348bb5&amp;ref_=aufs_ap_sc_dsk" target="_blank" rel="noopener">The Kingdom of Cain: Finding God in the Literature of Darkness.</a>” (May 2025, Zondervan/HarperCollins).

D-Day

America Now Honors D-Day By Celebrating Pride Month

France

Normandy

Pride Month

World War II

The New York Times, a former newspaper, has obtained a document from the Democrat party outlining their plan to spend $20 million in an effort to win back male voters. The effort is being hailed as a continuation of the great Democrat tradition of wasting money without even beginning to solve a problem created by their own stupid ideas.
The document, entitled “How to Make Toxic Men Love Us Even As we Castrate their Sons and Turn Their Women into Fractious Whores,” includes a collection of ideas from a diverse committee of women, black women, men pretending to be black women and feminists who are sort of like women only feminist. The effort is being hailed as a continuation of the great Democrat tradition of forming committees on the basis of diversity and thus laying the groundwork for a hilarious catastrophe that was predictable to everyone except a diverse committee.
To add an international flavor to the committee, the Democrats reached out to French President Emmanuel Macron, who said, “I think in order to properly study men, we need to…” But he couldn’t finish, because his wife smacked him in the face.
At the heart of the Democrat’s effort is an attempt to learn how to speak to potential male voters by studying liberal men in their native habitats, like gay bars and the ballet. This attempt comes on the heels of the failed presidential campaign of what’s-her-name, that cackling semi-black girl, who chose Minnesota Governor Tim Walz as her running mate because of his ability to code-switch from talking like a homosexual serial killer to talking like a homosexual serial killer trying to sound like a regular guy.
In the wake of that failure, the Democrats hope to learn how to communicate with men online by — and, my hand to God, this is a real quote — “studying the syntax, language and content that gains attention and virality in men’s spaces.’” So, for instance, instead of just bluntly telling men it’s time for them to take a backseat and let women lead the way into a glorious female future of unreasoning chatter followed by helpless sobbing interrupted by snapping at anyone who tries to make them feel better, Democrats might now attempt to gain attention and virality by posting such male-coded messages as, “Hey, Bro, how about giving the chicks a chance for a change, and meanwhile pass me the soap with those attractive, muscular arms of yours.”
<h3><a href="https://www.dailywire.com/episode/ep-1232-this-is-fine?elementPosition=0&amp;row=0&amp;rowType=Vertical+Show+Episodes+Carousel" target="_blank" rel="noopener">WATCH: The Andrew Klavan Show</a></h3>
To ensure their new man language is not limited to English-speakers, Democrats interviewed French President Emmanuel Macron, who said, “I believe in order to speak with men, you have to…” But he was unable to finish, because his wife smacked him in the face.
The document also suggests the party might want to change its hectoring tone of school-marmish moralizing, just in case that alienates some men or causes them to projectile vomit their last three beers into the face of the first Democrat they see. In order to help them stop moralizing, the Democrats have appointed a diverse committee to run a $50 million study entitled “What is Morality, and How is it Different from Sexually Mutilating Children in order to Pretend Gender is a Social Construct?” 
In a further effort to communicate with men, the Democrats are seeking to create a &#8220;new Joe Rogan&#8221; to head a popular male-oriented podcast. After a $75 million study by a diverse committee, the Democrats discovered that Rogan actually used to be a Democrat himself until he found out the Democrats were a bunch of Communist perverts. The Democrats feel they can fix that problem by replacing Rogan with some other bald man with a lot of tattoos, and hoping no one notices the difference.
To internationalize the appeal of the new Democrat Rogan, the Democrats sought advice from French president Emmanuel Macron, who said, “The whole secret to Joe Rogan is that…” But he was unable to finish because his wife smacked him in the face.
More recently, in a controversial move, the Democrats decided to add a man to their diverse study committee and, after a great deal of debate, they finally appointed Emmanuel Macron’s wife.
* * *
This excerpt is taken from the opening satirical monologue of “<a href="https://www.dailywire.com/show/the-andrew-klavan-show" target="_blank" rel="noopener">The Andrew Klavan Show</a>.”
The views expressed in this satirical article are those of the author and do not necessarily represent those of The Daily Wire.
Andrew Klavan is the host of “The Andrew Klavan Show” at The Daily Wire. Follow him on X: <a href="https://x.com/andrewklavan" target="_blank" rel="noopener">@andrewklavan</a>
Klavan is the bestselling author of numerous books, including the Cameron Winter Mystery series. The fourth installment, “<a href="https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/1613165536?ref_=dbs_m_mng_rwt_calw_thcv_3&amp;storeType=ebooks" target="_blank" rel="noopener">A Woman Underground.</a>” His most recent nonfiction release is “<a href="https://www.amazon.com/Kingdom-Cain-Finding-Literature-Darkness/dp/0310368340/?_encoding=UTF8&amp;pd_rd_w=nMYjR&amp;content-id=amzn1.sym.bc3ba8d1-5076-4ab7-9ba8-a5c6211e002d&amp;pf_rd_p=bc3ba8d1-5076-4ab7-9ba8-a5c6211e002d&amp;pf_rd_r=133-8344803-2786917&amp;pd_rd_wg=7a8J3&amp;pd_rd_r=5791ea0f-6d96-4732-9d6a-3a4e6b348bb5&amp;ref_=aufs_ap_sc_dsk" target="_blank" rel="noopener">The Kingdom of Cain: Finding God in the Literature of Darkness.</a>” (May 2025, Zondervan/HarperCollins).

Emmanuel Macron et Brigitte Macron

Democrats Ask Brigitte Macron: What Is A Man?

Brigitte Macron

Emmanuel Macron

Voters

The news media and the Democrats — but I repeat myself — are reeling after the release of Jake Tapper’s new book, “Oh My God, I Lied About Everything!” The book is the result of Tapper’s eight-month investigation into Jake Tapper during which Tapper discovered that almost every word out of Tapper’s mouth has been entirely untrue.
Tapper says the break in his investigation came after he managed to isolate Tapper in an interrogation room under a bright light where he continually slapped him, shouting “Confess, you two-faced bastard,” until Tapper broke under the brutal questioning and confessed to Tapper that he’d been deceiving the public for years.
In a searching interview on his CNN Show, “Jake Tapper Investigates,” Jake Tapper told Jake Tapper, “I was absolutely shocked at the depth of my duplicity. I lied about Trump’s collusion with the Russians, I lied about Trump saying there were good people among the white supremacists. You know that time I said that George Floyd’s death indicated widespread racism among police? Total BS! Oh, and how about my panic-mongering during the pandemic unleashed by China with funding from Fauci? So help me, a word of truth in my mouth would die of loneliness. Finally — get this — I actually had the gall to publish a book on the cover-up of Joe Biden’s dementia in which I pretended to take some responsibility for not covering the story. Not covering the story? I covered the hell out of it! The idea that those lies were any different than all the other lies I told — that was the biggest lie of all!”
As Tapper’s book rose on fiction bestseller lists, other journalists and Democrats — but I repeat repeating myself — also began to rake in profits by getting to the bottom of the lies they’d been telling for years.
<h3><a href="https://www.dailywire.com/show/the-andrew-klavan-show" target="_blank" rel="noopener">WATCH: The Andrew Klavan Show</a></h3>
At ABC, for instance, George Stephanopoulos, the host of &#8220;Good Morning America,&#8221; opened the show with a special report blowing the lid off the consistent dishonesty of George Stephanopoulos, the host of &#8220;Good Morning America.&#8221;
“It’s terrible to think that George Stephanopoulos would have actually gotten away with these lies if I hadn’t exposed him,” said George Stephanopoulos. “I mean, let’s go back to the very beginning of my career. All those women who said Bill Clinton was chasing after them with his wing-wang hanging out? The only one lying was me when I said they were lying. Then, when ABC hired me after all that lying, I figured they just wanted me to keep on lying, so I did. Like, remember how we spiked Amy Robach’s Jeffrey Epstein story during Hillary Clinton’s campaign, and I said I had nothing to do with the decision? Well, I did a deep dive into that incident, let me tell you, and it turned out it was me all along.”
At CBS, News President Wendy McMahon resigned after “60 Minutes” was caught editing an interview with Vice President Kamala Harris so that a learned disquisition on Middle East politics by an AI Kamala voice was dubbed over Harris’s original statement which consisted of a series of random words interrupted by loud cackling laughter. Miss McMahon said that after finding out how dishonest she was, she could no longer work with herself.
<a href="https://get.dailywire.com/subscribe/plus/?utm_medium=website&amp;utm_source=editorial&amp;utm_campaign=memorial&amp;utm_content=editorialmemorialday" target="_blank" rel="noopener">Memorial Day Sale – Get 40% Off New DailyWire+ Annual Memberships</a>
Bob Woodward has published a new 4,000-page book called &#8220;Bull,&#8221; in which Bob Woodward’s lies are exposed by an anonymous source called Deep Bob. Meeting in a shadowy underground garage, Deep Bob tells Woodward the so-called Watergate scandal was just a lot of minor mischief blown out of proportion to punish Nixon for being right about all the communists in the government. In another interview last week, former President John F. Kennedy told Woodward, “Oh, sure, my behavior was much worse than Nixon’s and no one covered that at all. Why do you think I had to leave town in such a hurry? Frankly, I think the entire history of the 20th century needs to be rewritten.”
Reacting to these revelations, former President Joe Biden said, “The whole thing’s absurd. Now all these journalists are blaming me for Trump’s re-election. What did I do? No, seriously, I can’t remember: what did I do?”

Jake Tapper

Legacy Media Shocked To Discover That Jake Tapper Lied About Everything

George Stephanopoulos

Legacy Media

Recently, the news stories in the media have been coming so fast and furious they’re almost like a group of muscular bald men driving hot cars out of airplanes, landing them on top of other cars, and then driving away at high speed while firing a rocket launcher out the window&#8230; because they’re fast and… well, never mind.
Anyway, I began to wonder: how can the news media report all this news in a way that reflects the outlooks of Americans everywhere across this great land, from the pine forests of Vermont to the golden wheat fields of Kansas, across the vast expanses of Texas to the sun-baked beaches of the Pacific Coast? So I decided I would take a look at the headlines of news outlets from 40th Street in Manhattan all the way to 47th Street — because that’s about all of them.
So for instance, in the news, inflation slowed to its lowest rate in more than four years.
Here’s the headline from The Wall Street Journal: &#8220;Trump’s Tariffs to Cause Massive Inflation Very, Very Soon, Experts Who Predicted Massive Inflation Because of Trump’s Tariffs Very Soon Say.&#8221;
<h3><a href="https://www.dailywire.com/show/the-andrew-klavan-show" target="_blank" rel="noopener">WATCH: The Andrew Klavan Show</a></h3>
Here’s One From The New York Times: &#8220;Hardworking Migrant Juan Ortega May Lose His Chicken Farm as Trump’s Policies Cause the Bottom to Fall Out of Egg Prices.&#8221;
And here’s the Report from NPR: &#8220;How Lower Inflation Spurred the Rise of Hitler,&#8221; a historical report read by a person with a very soft, sleepy voice that will make you want to hurt yourself just to make it stop.
Another news story: Trump negotiated a ceasefire between hostile nuclear powers India and Pakistan.
From The Wall Street Journal: &#8220;Nuclear Devastation Averted, Leaving Millions Alive to Suffer Massive Inflation Very Soon Because of Donald Trump’s Tariffs, Experts who Predicted Massive Inflation Very Soon Because of Donald Trump’s Tariffs Say.&#8221;
Or from The New York Times: &#8220;Environmentalists Worry that Trump’s Reckless Actions on the Indian Subcontinent Will Leave Earth’s Population at Levels Sure to Cause Devastating Climate Change.&#8221;
Or the story as reported by NBC News: &#8220;Biden’s Policy of Mindlessly Prolonging Foreign Wars to No Effect Finally Pays Big Dividends by Bringing Peace Deal Between India and Pakistan.&#8221;
In other news, Trump negotiated the release of Edan Alexander, the last living American hostage being held by vampiric Palestinian monsters.
The headline in The Wall Street Journal reads: &#8220;Released Hostage Finds Himself in a World Soon to be Wracked by Massive Inflation Caused by Trump’s Tariffs, According to Experts.&#8221;
The New York Times headline was: &#8220;Sad Little Palestinian Boy Jihad Muhammed Sharia Jihad Jihad Muhammed Sheds Sad Tears of Very Sad Sadness as Genocidal Israelis Steal the Wonderful Friend his Parents Kept Chained up for Him in the Basement.&#8221;
And of course, CNN featured an interview with a Columbia University professor who once read part of a book on Israel and says the Jews sound genocidal to him until Scott Jennings knocks him unconscious and jumps up and down on his face.
Then there was the news that Donald Trump had negotiated several trillion dollars in American investment from Saudi Arabia.
The Wall Street Journal reported the story with the headline: &#8220;Saudis Want to Invest in America but Whoa Nellie, Just Wait Till They See the Massive Inflation that’s Going to be Caused by Trump’s Tariffs Any Day Now, Experts Say.&#8221;
The Headline in The New York Times reads: &#8220;Sad Yale Historian Who Studies Fascism Says He Is Leaving America Because Trump’s Presidency Will Look Just Like Fascism as Soon as It Looks Like Fascism.&#8221;
And CBS reported: &#8220;Weak Trump Caves to Saudi Demands that he take their Money.&#8221;
In other news, Trump struck a deal with China to free us from their hammerlock on our supply lines, brought down drug prices, bombed the Houthis into submission, opened U.K. markets to American farmers, made progress on a nuclear deal with Iran, and the headlines say….. oh, screw it.
***
This excerpt is taken from the opening satirical monologue of “<a href="https://www.dailywire.com/show/the-andrew-klavan-show" target="_blank" rel="noopener">The Andrew Klavan Show</a>.”
The views expressed in this satirical article are those of the author and do not necessarily represent those of The Daily Wire.
Andrew Klavan is the host of “The Andrew Klavan Show” at The Daily Wire. Follow him on X: <a href="https://x.com/andrewklavan" target="_blank" rel="noopener">@andrewklavan</a>
Klavan is the bestselling author of numerous books, including the Cameron Winter Mystery series. The fourth installment, “<a href="https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/1613165536?ref_=dbs_m_mng_rwt_calw_thcv_3&amp;storeType=ebooks" target="_blank" rel="noopener">A Woman Underground.</a>” His most recent nonfiction release is “<a href="https://www.amazon.com/Kingdom-Cain-Finding-Literature-Darkness/dp/0310368340/?_encoding=UTF8&amp;pd_rd_w=nMYjR&amp;content-id=amzn1.sym.bc3ba8d1-5076-4ab7-9ba8-a5c6211e002d&amp;pf_rd_p=bc3ba8d1-5076-4ab7-9ba8-a5c6211e002d&amp;pf_rd_r=133-8344803-2786917&amp;pd_rd_wg=7a8J3&amp;pd_rd_r=5791ea0f-6d96-4732-9d6a-3a4e6b348bb5&amp;ref_=aufs_ap_sc_dsk" target="_blank" rel="noopener">The Kingdom of Cain: Finding God in the Literature of Darkness.</a>” (May 2025, Zondervan/HarperCollins).

Donald Trump, Qatari Emir Sheikh Tamim bin Hamad Al Thani

Trump’s Global Triumphs Cause Inflation Apocalypse, Say Analysts Cheering For Inflation Apocalypse

Donald Trump

Economy

Foreign Policy

Inflation

Tariffs

Daily Wire host Andrew Klavan’s “The Kingdom of Cain: Finding God in the Literature of Darkness,” hit the No. 13 spot on the New York Times hardcover nonfiction <a href="https://www.nytimes.com/books/best-sellers/hardcover-nonfiction/" target="_blank" rel="noopener">bestseller list</a> this week, showing, yet again, that readers are itching to soak up Klavan’s timeless wisdom. 
“<a href="https://www.amazon.com/Kingdom-Cain-Finding-Literature-Darkness/dp/0310368340" target="_blank" rel="noopener">The Kingdom of Cain</a>,” which hit shelves on May 6, explores how people can obey the biblical command to “rejoice evermore” when the world is filled with so much evil. Klavan’s book quickly became the No. 1 book in Christian Death and Grief on Amazon before hitting the NYT bestseller list. 
“Delighted to tell you that ‘Kingdom of Cain: Finding God in the Literature of Darkness’ has made the NY Times Bestseller List. Thank you all for picking up a copy. I hope you come to love it as much as I do,” Klavan <a href="https://x.com/andrewklavan/status/1922789461164802089" target="_blank" rel="noopener">wrote</a> on social media on Wednesday. 
The book focuses on three murders throughout history “and the works of art that reveal the nature of their evil.” First, Klavan highlights the killing of French con man Jean-François Chardon and his mother by the thief Pierre François Lacenaire in 1834, which Klavan <a href="https://www.dailywire.com/news/murder-madness-meaning-how-can-we-rejoice-always-when-the-world-often-seems-so-broken?author=Daily+Wire+Shop&amp;category=News&amp;elementPosition=2&amp;row=0&amp;rowType=Vertical+List&amp;title=Murder%2C+Madness%2C+Meaning%3A+How+Can+We+%E2%80%98Rejoice+Always%E2%80%99+When+The+World+Often+Seems+So+Broken%3F">says</a> sparked “the beginning of a startling century-long dance between art and reality.” Then, the author shifts to the murders committed in the American Midwest in the 1950s by psychopath Ed Gein, the murders that inspired the novel “Psycho” written by Robert Bloch, which then went on to inspire Alfred Hitchcock’s movie of the same name. 
Finally, Klavan goes to the beginning: Cain’s murder of Abel, and how Cain’s presence continues throughout the Old and New Testaments. 
“The Kingdom of Cain” is available on <a href="https://www.amazon.com/Kingdom-Cain-Finding-Literature-Darkness/dp/0310368340" target="_blank" rel="noopener">Amazon</a>, and you can purchase signed copies of the bestselling book at <a href="https://store.dailywire.com/products/the-kingdom-of-cain?variant=42713621954620" target="_blank" rel="noopener">Daily Wire Shop</a>.

GDWOODMANAK15

Andrew Klavan’s New Book, ‘The Kingdom Of Cain,’ Hits NYT Bestseller List

Books

Daily Wire Shop

The Daily Wire

The New York Times

To prove that Donald Trump is a very mean person while journalists are totally compassionate and loving, CNN has aired a sympathetic interview with a member of a Mexican drug cartel. 
Now, I know what you’re thinking. You’re thinking, “Oh, Klavan, you marvelous merchant of magical mirth, only you could invent a scenario in which a Left-wing news outlet sinks so deeply into the bubbling tarpit of its own twisted political hatred that the lunatic idea of legitimizing a death-mongering gangster could wend its way through every level of internal decision-making without one voice of even semi-decency speaking up to say, “Wait, wait, we can’t allow our childish demonization of our political opponents to twist our souls into gnarled burnt offerings fit only for the altars of hell so that we actually call evil good and good evil right there on cable TV in front of our six or seven viewers.”
But no, my friends, I am not making this up.
CNN girl reporter Shapely Nudnick actually traveled to a Mexican hideout where she spoke sympathetically with a masked member of the Sinaloa Drug Cartel, whose former boss El Chapo was said to be personally responsible for the deaths of over 34,000 people.
Ms. Nudnick, winner of this year’s Pulitzer prize for most attractive backside, fetchingly leaned forward and asked the masked gangster – and as God is my witness, I am not making this up, “According to the Trump Administration, you are a terrorist … What do you make of that?”
The masked member of the murderous cartel responded, “I don’t like to get overly emotional because my job depends on inspiring terror in anyone who tries to stand in my way, but I must be honest and tell you this slur from your President Trump hurt my feelings very deeply. I am just a man trying to make a living in this crazy world, and when I heard I had been labeled a terrorist, my hands were literally shaking so hard I could barely shove a screwdriver into the face of one of my rivals. I respect President Trump, and respect is very important because people who don’t return my respect are often found inside plastic bags in several different locations. But a man must eat and, to be fair, our customers are mostly in the United States and as any good businessman will tell you, you have to go where the customers are and then slowly poison them to death. I hope the American people will push back against this insult, and if they don’t, I know where they live.”
<h3><a href="https://www.dailywire.com/show/the-andrew-klavan-show" target="_blank" rel="noopener">WATCH: The Andrew Klavan Show</a> </h3>
CNN has proudly announced that this interview is only the first in a new series of self-degrading acts of pure evil that will appear over the course of the Trump Presidency, and they’ve been airing tantalizing previews of future episodes. In one clip, Shapely Nudnik bravely travels to an undisclosed elementary school to interview a pedophile teacher who says, “I think it’s very cruel for people to demonize someone they don’t even know with ugly words like pervert and evil scum-sucking hell-fiend. I just thank heavens I belong to a teachers’ union where they support the idea that minor attracted persons can work at an elementary school. After all, that’s where the children are, not to mention the porn.” 
In another clip, Miss Nudnick scores an interview with former Nazi torture doctor Joseph Mengele who says, “It’s true I used to perform grotesque and unspeakable medical experiments on children, but I’ve totally reformed, and now I’m supplying kids with gender affirming care, because I’ve had a lot of practice, and that’s what I’m good at.” 
In other Left-wing media news, the Pulitzer committee has awarded its prize for photography to a picture of a bullet flying at President Trump’s head. Committee Chairman Thaddeus Foul-heart said, “We know that other photo of a wounded Trump raising his fist with the American flag in the background is the single most iconic image of the first quarter of this century, but that photo inspired love and admiration for our president, whereas we were rooting for the bullet.”
* * *
This excerpt is taken from the opening satirical monologue of “<a href="https://www.dailywire.com/show/the-andrew-klavan-show" target="_blank" rel="noopener">The Andrew Klavan Show</a>.”
The views expressed in this satirical article are those of the author and do not necessarily represent those of The Daily Wire.
Andrew Klavan is the host of “The Andrew Klavan Show” at The Daily Wire. Follow him on X: @andrewklavan
Klavan is the bestselling author of numerous books, including the Cameron Winter Mystery series. The fourth installment, “<a href="https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/1613165536?ref_=dbs_m_mng_rwt_calw_thcv_3&amp;storeType=ebooks" target="_blank" rel="noopener">A Woman Underground.</a>” His most recent nonfiction release is “<a href="https://www.amazon.com/Kingdom-Cain-Finding-Literature-Darkness/dp/0310368340/?_encoding=UTF8&amp;pd_rd_w=nMYjR&amp;content-id=amzn1.sym.bc3ba8d1-5076-4ab7-9ba8-a5c6211e002d&amp;pf_rd_p=bc3ba8d1-5076-4ab7-9ba8-a5c6211e002d&amp;pf_rd_r=133-8344803-2786917&amp;pd_rd_wg=7a8J3&amp;pd_rd_r=5791ea0f-6d96-4732-9d6a-3a4e6b348bb5&amp;ref_=aufs_ap_sc_dsk" target="_blank" rel="noopener">The Kingdom of Cain: Finding God in the Literature of Darkness.</a>” (May 2025, Zondervan/HarperCollins).

CNN Airs Heartfelt Sit-Down With Masked Cartel Hitman

interview

Mexico

President Trump

Sinaloa Cartel

Terrorism

Andrew Klavan’s new book arrived in my inbox with providential timing. Only a few hours before I started perusing The Kingdom of Cain: Finding God in the Literature of Darkness, I’d signed a publishing contract for my first novel — a story of murder, prostitution, and the many debased things that fallen man is willing to do in pursuit of his ambitions.
But a tiny part of me blushed at the plot I was preparing to put down on paper — what would compel a Christian, a self-professed church lady no less, to tell such a sordid tale?  What compels other Christians to read them? Klavan, as might be expected from an award-winning crime writer and very public Christ-follower, has long been thinking about such questions and now provides an answer.
“We should look at the question from the other direction,” Klavan says, “what good does it do anybody to write about the world as it&#8217;s not?” And the world, as he details through the true stories of three notorious killers — including history’s first killer — can be a very dark place. Portraying that darkness accurately in our art, Klavan contends, is one way we can better recognize and appreciate the light.
As one endorser of The Kingdom of Cain said, the book is part meditation and part memoir. I’d add, it’s also part apologia, as Klavan makes an argument for the ultimate triumph of not just a generic goodness but a Christian goodness. Evil, he argues, in the tradition of C.S. Lewis’ The Problem of Pain, is the unwelcome guest to the original state of creation, which, as we know from Genesis, was very good.
“The shall-nots of the Ten Commandments are not restrictions on our true selves,” writes Klavan, “They are a guide to clearing the path to our original nature so we can become who we truly are.” Another way to say it is that the world began with a moral order, and what goes against that order is the intruder. Klavan explains why this reality should inform the work of any Christian artist seeking to write words that ring true. “I will write about absolutely horrific things,” he says, “but always in the moral world.”
What does writing dark works in the moral world look like? He shows us.
While analyzing the great fictional works his three case studies inspired, Klavan’s insights give new relish to film classics, offering fresh revelations about their appeal to audiences. One of his chapters on 1950s cross-dressing serial killer Ed Gein dissects how he is reimagined in the film Psycho. Unlike the novel it was based on, the movie recognizes not just the psychological brokenness of its villain, but his spiritual deformity. What the Catholic Hitchcock “understood in his bones,” Klavan writes, “is that there is a tension between the things of the spirit and the things of the flesh.”
And so, the great director played up that tension, bringing about his female lead’s murder right as she is in a moment of redemption, preparing to make amends for stealing $40,000 from her employer. This elevates the story from simple scare fest to tragedy.
“[Lead female character Marion’s] work in the film is the work of the spirit,” Klavan writes. Through her death, Hitchcock picked up on an aspect of Gein’s history that Psycho’s initial author didn’t — &#8220;the struggle to reconcile religion with eroticism is real.” This is something Hitchcock subtly points to by having Norman Bates use a biblical painting of Susanna and the Elders, which depicts two spiritual leaders trying to sexually exploit a woman as she is bathing, as a peephole to spy on Marion undressing for the shower.
From the Book of Daniel to the Bates Motel — the baser impulses of men will ever be a threat to women.
Other works inspired by the Gein case, like The Silence of the Lambs, compel because they not only tell us truthfully of the violence associated with perverted sexual desire, they also mock the idea that the explanations for such violence will be provided by psychiatry rather than religion. Hannibal Lecter is simply the face of unapologetic evil — like the icy Nietzscheans Leopold and Loeb (whose story Klavan also details), there is no Freudian concept that will restrain his malevolence. He would have to become an entirely new creature for that, a magic that only Christianity can work.
The book is full of similar, worthy insights, particularly when it comes to works inspired by the story of Cain. It is clear that for Klavan, there is no joy like the joy of accurately representing the human experience, and humanity is sinful. You cannot tell compelling stories while hiding reality, something the Bible’s authors apparently knew very well, given the horrors that fill Scripture’s pages from incest, to gang rapes, to, well, crucifixion.
Too often, Christians forget the “true” part of the Apostle Paul’s admonition to think about: &#8220;whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable.” Truth is sometimes ugly, but all truth is God’s truth, Klavan tells me, and will reflect God’s moral order. “Every honest story, every true story, has God,” he says
“Whether you believe or not, if you tell a true story, if you tell the truth about life, God will be there.”

Untitled design (31)

Andrew Klavan’s Dark World

Bible

Christianity

The following excerpt is from Andrew Klavan’s Amazon best-selling book, The Kingdom of Cain: Finding God in the Literature of Darkness, (Zondervan/HarperCollins, May 6, 2025) which you can <a href="https://www.amazon.com/Kingdom-Cain-Finding-Literature-Darkness/dp/0310368340/ref=sr_1_1?crid=1ODLLWRUYFQLX&amp;dib=eyJ2IjoiMSJ9.-asrk-u7s-sDyhCZt2HswSh97P9UrU8fIOFQ6ixtmpKTB1DBbhizDhTlIu-UqaLkK7N0nbUSyzC-7AF7vHD1eKuT-zxV0AKvUdyGQtz3PVdxbQPtExJGPweEKI5A7u8oRKT8qGQ_emtFCVDLrzEIdR6Q4n645BIOoF3oQHLkrRF52UD0dBOnHAasIM3LWhrGXj8CZhnLqvGlRuqStS9pQrKn7rhqrcGVNFJZaH1Spuw.fvQZ5IniKW9xjinwdGzONrUwsBlcMLwjXhbqgG1ldB4&amp;dib_tag=se&amp;keywords=kingdom+of+cain&amp;qid=1746467024&amp;sprefix=kingdom+of+cain%2Caps%2C174&amp;sr=8-1" target="_blank" rel="noopener">order now</a>.
REJOICE EVERMORE!
So Scripture commands us. But how can you rejoice in a world of so much darkness? At a time like twilight when darkness gathers, ready to fall? The comforting bromides of belief can seem pat and complacent in the shadow of very present wickedness. Everything happens for a reason. There must be evil so there can be free will. God is in charge and will make things right in the end. No doubt. And it is some comfort too. But here we are today, and faith in the things unseen, and hope in the far-off country of our salvation don’t have the tangible immediacy of our suffering and distress.
More than this, and deeper. From our first cry to our last one, life is little more than letting go, a long goodbye. The pain, the grief, the traumas physical and emotional that scar our minds: sorrow is so woven into the very fabric of material existence that to turn our faces from it is to turn away from life itself. In the face of our mourning mortality, even Jesus wept.
In part 1, I write about the three murders and the works of art that reveal the nature of their evil. In part 2, I reflect on creative practices of truth and beauty that allow one to confront this evil with love and, through love, with joy. By joy, of course, I don’t mean smiley-faced complacency or quietism. I’m talking about preserving the gusto of living, even when you are living honestly, which means acknowledging grief and pain.
The first murder is the 1834 killing of the French con man Jean-François Chardon and his mother by the violent but elegant and eloquent thief Pierre François Lacenaire. This murder was the beginning of a startling century-long dance between art and reality. Lacenaire’s philosophical musings inspired the Russian novelist Fyodor Dostoevsky to create the classic novel Crime and Punishment. Dostoevsky’s work predicted and inspired the atheistic philosophy of Friedrich Nietzsche. Nietzsche, in turn, inspired the famous American murderers of the 1920s, Leopold and Loeb. They then became the subjects of any number of books and movies, including Alfred Hitchcock’s innovative film, Rope. Throughout this bizarre and deadly story cycle, the theme in play is the death of Christian faith and the attempt to rewrite and rise above the Christian moral order—an attempt still being made today.
Next, I deal—as delicately as I can—with the monstrous crimes committed in the American Midwest of the 1950s by the psychopath Ed Gein. Gein murdered women and wore their bodies as costumes. These grotesque horrors inspired the novel Psycho by Robert Bloch, which was the basis of the Alfred Hitchcock movie of the same name, now regarded as one of the greatest works of American cinema. Psycho gave birth to an entire genre, the slasher film, which includes everything from disastrous trash and reprehensible torture porn to serious-minded horror like The Texas Chain Saw Massacre and ultimately the insightful novel and Oscar-winning film The Silence of the Lambs, also based on the Gein murders. The theme of this cycle is, of course, the confusion of sexual identity, but it is also the role of psychiatric theory in creating and confronting that confusion.
The last murder I write about is the first: the killing of Abel by Cain. The theme here is the failure of theodicy, the inability to accept the goodness of a God who presides over a world full of so much cruelty and injustice. I can’t write about the works of art inspired by Cain’s actions, because in some sense all art is inspired by his actions. He is the first man born after the fall, and all history flows out of him. This is Cain’s kingdom; we’re just living in it. Instead, I trace Cain’s continued presence throughout the Old and New Testaments because I believe the Bible contains, in microcosm, all history and all art.
The second part of the book is more personal. I don’t hold myself up as a role model of anything. I am not a pastor or a theologian. You should get your religious rule book from a better source. But because each inner life is different, each act of spiritual creation is unique. Whether a rainbow looks the same to me as it does to you, it is always only our own.
In light of this, I’ve chosen to write three brief reflections on practices that have deepened my relationship with Jesus Christ. My reason for this is that in Christ, I find I experience both the cross and the resurrection—that is, a heightened awareness of evil, injustice, and suffering accompanied by a seemingly absurd increase in serenity and joy.
The first of these reflections is on the ritual of communion—my answer to Lacenaire and to the intellectual collapse of the Christian moral order.
The second is a reflection on the atheistic psychotherapy that miraculously restored me to sanity in my youth and freed me to accept the grace of God. This is my answer to Ed Gein and, through him, the misbegotten nature of today’s therapeutic culture and the gender confusion that has arisen along with it.
The closing chapter is on art and beauty, and how it suggests to me a theodicy no mere philosophy can provide, a faithful response to suffering. This is my answer to Cain.
INTRODUCTION
To sum it up then:
My subject is murder and the imagination. My premise is that murder is evil. My belief is that God is love, and love is the source of joy.
If, then, I enter the literature of darkness, I do it with a sure and certain faith in the reality of light, not light in a future heaven but light in this world of sin and suffering, not light in the world to come but light in this world of present darkness, including the darkness of murder.
Light. Love. Joy. Beauty. 
 Here. Now. In the kingdom of Cain.
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Murder

Murder, Madness, Meaning: How Can We ‘Rejoice Always’ When The World Often Seems So Broken?

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