WALSH: Meghan Markle Is A Self-Victimizing Drama Queen

I must confess that I have always struggled to understand why people, especially Americans, care so much about the always evolving soap opera surrounding the royal family. From my perspective, the most interesting thing about them is the fact that everyone finds them so interesting. Maybe this is how we all get sucked in. It’s a bit like walking down the sidewalk and noticing a group of people sitting on someone’s front lawn, intently watching the grass grow. You stop and stare at the people who are staring at the grass, fascinated by the fact that they’re fascinated by this mundane thing. Another group stops and stares at you, and on an on, until a million people are gazing aimlessly, none exactly sure what they’re looking at or why. I admit that this analogy is probably a bit unfair to grass. Grass may be decorative, like the royal family, but it’s also functional, unlike the royal family.

If you have been a sentient human in western civilization for the past year, you probably heard that two of the least functional and most boring of this group, Meghan Markle and Prince Harry, split off from the family and came to America in pursuit of privacy and, as Meghan put it, an “authentic” and “back to basics” life. They might have had all of those things, too, if they really wanted them. If that was the aim, they could have dropped out of the public eye, retreated to a cabin in the wilderness, and lived in quiet solitude and reflection. But that’s not the path they chose. Instead, Harry and Meghan stepped away from the pomp and circumstance of celebrity life overseas only to embrace the pomp and circumstance of celebrity life in the United States.