Leftists Promise To Rewrite The Classic Works Of Roald Dahl As They Redesign Western Culture

The following is the opening satirical monologue from “The Andrew Klavan Show.“

The bestselling children’s books by the late, great British novelist Roald Dahl are being rewritten by a concerned group of crap-faced cultural locusts with no sense of humor so they will no longer be offensive to crap-faced cultural locusts with no sense of humor. The president of Puffin publishers, Crappy McLocust, says beloved creative works like “Charlie and The Chocolate Factory” and “James and the Giant Peach,” will be rewritten by people who have never created anything beloved by anyone in order to bring them in line with the standards of people who are uncreative and unlovable.