In 2020, Let’s Try to Find Common Ground Between Americans And Democrats [Satire]

The following is satirical.

As we begin a new year and a new decade, it’s time to turn our thoughts to ending the nation’s great political divide. We must begin to seek common ground between those of us who believe in the sacred principles of the American founding and the Democrats who are attempting to devour those principles like a swarm of locusts or some sort of toxic green slime that seeps into the fabric of our most cherished traditions and eats away at them like acid, and then, like in some disgusting horror movie, slowly morphs into the shape of an eighty-year-old Communist and runs for president.