“THEY BROKE MY FLOATIE!!!!”
On a quiet afternoon in the township of Rockaway, New Jersey, the Basso Family was gearing up to take a dip in the classiest above-ground-pool this side of Trump Taj Mahal. That is, until another family decided to take advantage of the situation. (That situation being a nice unguarded neighborhood recreational area intended for residents only.)
What type of family was this? You guessed it, a bear family. The news was particularly alarming to MTV’s lawyers who threatened lawsuits claiming they own the rights to all Jersey-based shows about hairy, lethargic beasts living together.
Tim Basso said his 3 and 5-year-old daughters were not too keen on sharing their toys with the cubs. “I thought they would get a drink and move on, but they stayed,” he says.
But after about an hour the bears had had their fill and cleared out. Studies have shown that both man and beast lose above-ground-pool interest in about an hour unless further stimuli is provided.
Authorities have decided not to open a trespass investigation, but some voices on the internet are decrying the lack of justice, saying this is a pattern of bad behavior that must be checked, citing this recent incident in Texas.
A spokesperson for the bear family, however, did reach out with this statement:
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