The decade's most triggering comedy
Over the last century, archeologists in China uncovered tens of thousands of ancient “oracle bones,” which are the bones of animals that carry some kind of inscription. The discoveries proved that during the Shang Dynasty in ancient China, humans and animals were often sacrificed in order to change the weather. One inscription on an oracle bone read simply, “Should a man be burnt at the stakes? Will rain follow?” Most of these victims, anthropologists noted, were slaves, prisoners of war, beggars, and cripples. The Chinese believed that by killing off these undesirables, they’d cause it to rain.
In that sense, the ancient Chinese had a lot in common with the Aztecs, who fought wars to secure new victims for their human sacrifices. Those sacrifices included the ritual killing of children on top of a mountain to honor Tlaloc, their god of rainfall.
Thousands of years later, we have inventions like meteorology, and the internet. So you might think that ritual sacrifices would have stopped. But in many parts of the world, they’ve persisted. In 2007, for example, Nepal’s state-run airline was having a lot of issues with one of their Boeing aircraft. Their solution was to sacrifice two goats in front of the plane, to appease the sky god and ensure the plane had safe passage. Executives were thrilled when the plane managed to take off and land.
At the time, that story was mostly met with amusement in this country. It was unthinkable for anything like that to happen here, we thought. Sure, we have no room to make fun of them. They might have sacrificed a goat outside of the plane. But we allow people to bring goats onto the plane as emotional support animals. As a passenger, I prefer the sacrifice strategy. At any rate, people clicked on the story from Nepal, maybe had a good chuckle, and went about our day.
In retrospect, that was a mistake. As it turns out, we were never that far away from hearing our own politicians claim that they, too, have the power to change the weather with their own offerings to the sky god. Somehow, that line has officially been crossed.
A couple of days ago, Hillary Clinton posted a tweet, blaming Donald Trump’s supporters for the fact that the temperature has gone up this summer. Here it is: “Hot enough for you? Thank a MAGA Republican. Or better yet, vote them out of office.”
Hot enough for you?
Thank a MAGA Republican.
Or better yet, vote them out of office. https://t.co/0MFC6rPq6o
— Hillary Clinton (@HillaryClinton) July 25, 2023
You might recall that “MAGA Republicans” is an epithet that appeared out of nowhere about a year ago, when Democratic Party consultants made it up. And already, these MAGA Republicans are affecting the weather simply by existing.
How are they doing that? One of the articles that Hillary Clinton cites in her tweet was published in Forbes. The piece reported:
“July 4th was Earth’s Hottest Day in Over 100,000 Years…”
That’s quite a claim, since we’ve only been able to track temperatures for the past 140 years. According to NASA:
“There are too few data before 1880 for scientists to estimate average temperatures for the entire planet.”
Even for the past 140 years, it seems highly dubious to assume that the records are accurate enough to confidently declare that we experienced the hottest day in a century and a half this month. Does anyone think we actually have a precisely accurate idea of what the temperature was everywhere on the planet on, say, August 11th, 1893? How much less do we know what the global temperature was on August 11th, 1893 BC? So suffice it to say, the Forbes piece isn’t particularly strong evidence to support the idea that Trump voters are somehow making it hot during the summer.
Let’s take stock of what’s happening here. This is the kind of thing we often laugh about and then move on from, but we should really spend some time thinking about it. One of the most prominent Democrats in the country, a former Secretary of State and presidential candidate, just sincerely blamed her political opponents for making it hot outside. And she did it on the basis of no evidence whatsoever — in fact, she lied about what little evidence she did present.
On some level we’re used to the climate change hysteria, and constant claims that the world is ending. But what makes this so especially insane is that she’s claiming that not only does human activity change the weather, but that a relatively small group of humans can bring about substantial changes in the weather in the span of just a few years. This isn’t just “human activity has caused global temperatures to rise by 2 degrees in 150 years” or whatever. This is “we’re having a devastating heatwave because of what my political opponents did last Tuesday.”
We’re in full-on primitive superstition territory here. Blaming your enemies for a heat wave is the kind of thing you expect to hear from a tribal chieftain in a loin cloth in the Amazon somewhere. Though I think even most of them are too advanced at this point to believe in that sort of thing.
But that’s the level of “science” that senior Democrats are now pushing. What comes next? In every other culture that’s gone down this path, ritual sacrifice is what comes next. Hillary Clinton’s already identified the problem: it’s predominantly middle-class Americans who voted the wrong way in the last election. They held too many cookouts. They drove trucks that were too big. Therefore, they’re making it hot outside, and they need to pay. That’s what she believes. How long before Hillary suggests building a giant pyramid and cutting the heart out of a middle-aged white guy in a red hat in order to appease Mother Earth, or maybe just for fun?
What’s really alarming is that it’s not just Hillary Clinton who thinks this way. The rest of the party, and the media, has been building to this conclusion for a long time. They’re not just blaming human activity for the weather — they’re blaming very recent and isolated human activity for the weather.
This kind of thinking took off sometime around 2018, when the Climate Institute warned that people are changing the weather just by running their air conditioning units. Their analysts determined that “using and producing air conditioning equipment exacerbates climate change.” They proposed that, in lieu of using air conditioning, people wear short sleeves and “rely on blinds and curtains more often.” Otherwise, they said, the climate will change. And of course the climate did change, because climates always change. That’s what climates do.
That same year, The Washington Post ran an op-ed entitled, “Another hurricane is about to batter our coast. Trump is complicit.” Complicit in a hurricane. Which is like accusing someone of being complicit in a solar eclipse. So it took just a year after he came into office for The Washington Post to blame Trump for bad weather. Then, two months before the last presidential election, as wildfires spread across California, Joe Biden endorsed that position, as totally deranged as it was. Watch:
"This could well be—this well could be—a conservative estimate. Donald Trump——'s climate denial——may not have caused these fires and record floods and record hurricanes, but if he gets a second term, these hellish events will continue to become more common… and more deadly." pic.twitter.com/lbwR8UdUo5
— Breitbart News (@BreitbartNews) September 14, 2020
If Trump gets a second term, Biden said, then, “these hellish events will continue to become more common, more devastating and more deadly.” In other words, we’ll have more hurricanes and wildfires and floods, and they’ll be more dangerous — if Donald Trump is in office for four years instead of Joe Biden. That’s what he’s saying. That was Joe Biden in 2020. Has anyone followed up with him on that pledge, now that he’s been in office for several years? Has he declared victory over bad weather?
Of course not. He and his allies, like Hillary Clinton, are actually telling us that the weather has only gotten worse. And the only way to keep the weather from continuing to deteriorate is to keep voting for them. It’s a scam. None of it’s remotely true.
Here’s the data on global annual deaths from natural disasters, including wildfires, volcanoes, extreme temperatures, droughts, earthquakes, and floods. It covers the 1990s, all the way to the 2010s. Notice how much safer things have gotten, by every metric.
But you never hear about this. Instead you’re told that natural disasters are getting more common, and more deadly. Currently, they’re reporting that the fires in Canada are historic. They said the same thing about the California fires a few years ago when Joe Biden was running for president. The truth is that wildfires used to be an order of magnitude worse than they are now Have you ever heard about the “great Midwest wildfires of 1871?” Probably not. Somehow it’s never mentioned. And that’s strange because according to the National Weather Service, it was the deadliest series of wildfires in American history. The fires killed thousands of people and destroyed millions of acres. How did that happen, more than a century before the rise of the MAGA Republicans? That’s a good question. Are MAGA Republicans able to control the weather in the past too? How far does their sorcery reach? We’ll have to ask Hillary Clinton about that.
But let’s be charitable for a second. Let’s assume, for the sake of argument, that none of these outlets or politicians are lying. Let’s pretend we are in a climate emergency, and everyone is about to burn up and die. If that’s the case, you’d think Hillary Clinton would be tweeting nonstop about China. You’d think Joe Biden would be imposing sanctions. China’s carbon emissions are more than double America’s. In fact, China emits more carbon than every developed nation on the planet, combined. Have they done anything to curb these emissions? Well, let’s see. China is building the equivalent of two large coal plants every week. This year, China’s carbon emissions have already set a new record.
But Hillary Clinton and Joe Biden don’t seem concerned. Instead, they’re demanding that you give up your gas stove and vote for them, or else. They leave China alone.
We’ve seen this before. Remember when the Left went on a campaign against plastic straws, warning that our plastic straws were polluting the ocean and killing the sea turtles? Well, what they refused to mention is that many Asian countries dump their trash directly into their rivers, sending millions of tons of garbage — straws included — floating out into the ocean in a giant conveyor belt-like system every year.
Now we’re seeing the same pattern play out, with carbon emissions. Except in this case, our leaders are the ones who enabled China’s rise as the world’s largest polluter. Twenty years ago, Bill Clinton approved the U.S.-China trade agreement and China’s entrance into the WTO. He said more trade with China would benefit Americans. He promised it wouldn’t crush the U.S. manufacturing sector. “We’ll be able to export products without exporting jobs,” he promised. And how has that worked out exactly?
But they refuse to take any responsibility for their role in creating the single greatest polluter on the planet.
The Clintons and the rest of their party have displayed no self-reflection or regret whatsoever about what they did. That’s because they don’t regret it. They don’t care about carbon emissions. They don’t really think that MAGA Republicans are actively making it hot in the summer. At least the leftists in charge don’t buy this stuff. It’s all fake. They care about power, to the point that Hillary is now babbling like an Aztec shaman — except the Aztec shaman would at least acknowledge he was practicing religion, not science. We’re ruled by people who can’t tell the difference.