Opinion

Confused Democrats Call Justice A Miscarriage Of Justice [Satire]

   DailyWire.com
WASHINGTON, DC - MAY 07: Former FBI director James Comey laughs while answering questions during an interview forum at the Washington Post May 8, 2018 in Washington, DC. Comey discussed his stormy tenure as head of the FBI, his handling of the Hillary Clinton email investigation, his tense relationship with President Trump and his controversial firing a year ago, during the forum.
Win McNamee/Getty Images

The following is satirical. 

The left and journalists, which is to say the left, which is to say journalists, are outraged at the miscarriage of justice that has brought justice to Michael Flynn. Flynn, you’ll remember, is the retired Lieutenant General who confessed to lying to the FBI after agents held him off the edge of a building and said, “Confess to lying to the FBI.”

New documents reveal that former President Barack Obama and former FBI Director James Comey conceived of this daring plan in hopes Flynn could be accused of violating the Logan Act, a law passed in 1799. Only two people have ever been indicted under the act, one in 1802 and one in 1852, both of them at the suggestion of Barack Obama and James Comey.

Now to understand why the Obama administration’s dealings with Flynn were so corrupt, you have to understand that Hillary Clinton hired Christopher Steele to collude with Vladimir Putin to give disinformation to John Brennan who gave it to James Comey who decided that Donald Trump was colluding with Vladimir Putin like Christopher Steele who’d been hired by Hillary Clinton.

And since you can’t possibly understand that, the left is screaming about a miscarriage of justice in the hopes that you’ll believe them because you’re ignorant and confused.

In a speech given before donning a fake mustache and buying a one-way ticket to Caraccas, Barack Obama said, “It is a dangerous threat to the rule of law to expose my complete disregard for the rule of law.”

The New York Times, a former newspaper, editorialized, “Attorney General William Barr has perverted the Department of Justice by turning it into a Department that seeks Justice.”

And CNN’s Brian Stelter complained, “Conservatives are seizing on the lies we told about Russian collusion to distract America from the lies we’re telling about the Chinese Flu.”

Stelter then retired to bed for a good cry, saying it was all too much for him, especially at this particular time of the month.

I have no idea what he meant by that.

More from Andrew Klavan: Our News Media Has Collapsed. I Blame Racism.