A bitterly cold spate of global warming has struck the East Coast, freezing harbors and blanketing whole cities under its sweltry frost. The cause? A "bomb cyclone," which the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration explains occurs when a "cold air mass collides with a warm air mass." Although Popular Science and National Geographic point out that such events, despite the intense name, are actually quite common, particularly in the northern Atlantic regions, the mainstream media have wasted no time in identifying the clear culprit behind the frigid cold front: global warming. The Washington Post, where democracy dies in darkness, quickly ran a headline Thursday to dispel any skepticism: "How Climate Change Could Counterintuitively Feed Winter Storms."
Have a look for yourself at the balmy floes . . .
Niagara Falls freezes as water molecules prepare themselves to evaporate into the broiling atmosphere.
Shoppers in Dumbo, Brooklyn, ignore "do not cross" signs as they race to escape the blazing sun.
Cars line both sides of the street as engines overheat in Stamford, CT.
Commuters to Greenwich, CT, ditch I-95 for the Long Island Ferry.
A trendy Brooklyn-ite dons half a snorkel in her tropical paradise.
A Stony Brook, NY, couple fetches a bag of ice after their air conditioner breaks from overuse.
A tractor sweeps bubbling asphalt off the main drag in Bellport, NY.
A despondent puppy in Bryant Park begs his owner to trim his coat just a little shorter.
Three beach bros cruise Main Street Medford, NY, on jet skis.
"On the way to Cape May, Stone Harbor skies were blue; we were naming the day when Wildwood came in view ..."
Can't wait for summer? The Atlantic City beach is open to swimmers!
Left-wing activists have long pointed out the difference between weather and climate. Telegenic smug-mugging science performer Neil deGrasse Tyson explains that, while the climate comprises long-term environmental patterns, "weather is what the atmosphere does in the short-term, hour-to-hour, day-to-day. Weather is chaotic, which means that even a microscopic disturbance can lead to large scale changes."
In other words, no reasonable person would ever base environmental conclusions about a chaotic system heretofore impervious to long-term foretelling on acute weather events that have occurred throughout all of recorded history, much less articulate those prophecies in unfalsifiable euphemisms whereby any such event corroborates the thesis — unless of course those conclusions are convenient for Democrats.