Satire

Trump Considered Bringing Hunter Biden’s Crack Dealer As Guest To Debate [Satire]

   DailyWire.com
First Lady Melania Trump and President Donald Trump walk to the South Lawn to depart the White House on October 22, 2020 in Washington, DC. President Trump travels to Nashville, Tennessee for the final debate with Democratic presidential nominee Joe Biden. The Commission on Presidential Debates changed the format this time, muting of microphones to start each of Thursday's debate segments. (Photo by Tasos Katopodis/Getty Images)
Tasos Katopodis/Getty Images

President Trump considered bringing Hunter Biden’s longtime crack dealer, Frank Fusco, as his guest of honor to tonight’s debate with former Vice President Joe Biden.

The President tweeted about it early this morning.

“With the Fake News and Big Tech censoring the Biden Crime Family’s corruption, I strongly considered bringing Hunter Biden’s longtime CRACK dealer, Frank Fusco, to tonight’s debate as my guest of honor. Perhaps too much for media to handle? I decided against it. FUN!”

Fake Trump tweet 3.

The tweet immediately lit up social media, with notable figures bashing Donald Trump for the idea.

Don Lemon, the host of CNN Tonight with Don Lemon, tweeted:

“In the middle of a pandemic that has killed over 200,000 Americans, Trump is tweeting about crack, which only kills 14,000 people each year. #Priorities”

Chuck Schumer, senator of New York (D), ripped Donald Trump for dragging an otherwise unknown drug dealer, Frank Fusco, into the spotlight:

“How much abuse will @KingpinFusco have to take from white supremacists now that they know who he is? Once a bully, always a bully. @FLOTUS, thoughts?”

Fake Schumer tweet.

But Trump shot back, tweeting:

“While I totally condemn the sale of crack, @KingpinFusco is still an AMERICAN, and I would like to see him move on to better things. Jeffrey and I are actually similar. His father loaned him a very tiny amount of crack, 10 grams, which eventually grew to over 500! #MAGA”

Fake Trump tweet 4.

This is not the first time Donald Trump considered bringing a controversial debate guest to rattle his opponent’s feathers. In 2016, then-candidate Trump threatened to bring Bill Clinton’s former mistress Gennifer Flowers to sit front row during one of his debates with Hillary. In another debate against Hillary in 2016, Trump went through with it and actually brought a controversial guest list to the event.

The Daily Wire reached out to Joe Biden for comment. He released a short statement in response: “On behalf of the entire Biden family, we will not engage in such utter nonsense. When they go low, we go high.”

While Americans might have enjoyed the drama of a crack cocaine dealer in the audience, they will have to settle for things that actually affect their lives, like a policy discussion.

Disclaimer: Everything that you just read about Trump considering inviting Hunter’s crack dealer is entirely false. As in, not real. As in, satire. It’s not fake news. That would be us presenting this as authentic. If this was shared with you by someone thinking this was a real story, go back and shame your friend for not reading the article to its end. If they did read it through, thank them for a laugh. What now? You didn’t find it funny? Well, that’s insulting. Now we’re hurt. Thanks for hurting our feelings. Actually, we get it. Facts don’t care about them.

More satire from The Daily Wire: Debate Commission to Equip Moderator with Mute Button, Taser and Fire Hose

Editor’s Note: The fake name originally used in this satirical piece as Hunter Biden’s “crack dealer” has been swapped out for another fake name.

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