Poll Shows Biden Leading Among Voters Who Need A Good Laugh [Satire]

A new poll shows Joe Biden would defeat Donald Trump if the election were held today in a science fiction horror movie where all the people have been taken over by space plants and have either become mindless zombie-like creatures or CNN viewers or both.

According to the poll from the Dogface Pony Soldier polling agency, 53 percent of voters are hoping either to vote for Biden on election day or be swept up to Heaven in the Rapture, whichever is less expensive.