Sticky-fingered socialist Bernie Sanders is apparently stealing his neighbor’s Washington Post subscription, as any good socialist might do.
In perhaps the funniest and most fitting news of the year, WMAL radio host Chris Plante told his audience of a story he heard from friends about the elderly senator. A man living next to Sanders apparently called the Post to complain that he was hardly ever receiving his subscription. After an investigation into the matter, the paying customer realized that it was his neighbor, Senator Sanders, who was stealing the paper right from under his nose.
Here’s Plante’s story via Red State:
Bernie Sanders and his wife Jane when they are in Washington DC, live in this house on Capitol Hill, ok? Part of their vast real estate empire. They’re like wannabe Trumps with their real estate holdings.
The next-door neighbor…their neighbor on Capitol Hill called the Washington Post and told the Washington Post that they were cancelling their Washington Post subscription because their very expensive Sunday Post stopped showing up. Not there this week, last week, the week before, then it was there one week but the week before it wasn’t delivered, so I’m cancelling my subscription to the post because your delivery person never gets to me. I’m paying for it but it never gets to me.
The Washington Post said, “Please, do not cancel your subscription to the Washington Post. We will investigate with the delivery person and we will get back to you.”
So the Post investigated. They got back to the person cancelling their subscription to the Post and they said, “Listen, we talked to the delivery person. Our delivery person claims has seen you come out of your house again and again and grab the paper on Sunday mornings. Immediately as the paper delivery person delivers the paper, they’ve seen you come out of your house and pick up the newspaper. So, sir, you are lying to us.”
[The neighbor] said, “Oh, ok, I’ve been coming out and picking up the paper?”
“Yes, and we got a description from the delivery person. You are an older man with gray hair, balding, and little round glasses…”
And the guy said, “I’m like, you know, in my 50s and I’ve got a full head of dark hair. But, my neighbor is Bernie Sanders.”
And Bernie Sanders has been coming out every Sunday morning and stealing his next door neighbor’s Washington Post.
First it was reported that the socialist was kicked out of a freaking commune for being too lazy. And now, Sanders is apparently stealing a newspaper from a neighbor who is actually shelling out the dough for it.
Sanders truly is an authentic socialist.
“He’s redistributing his neighbor’s Washington Post,” snarked Plante.
Listen (relevant comments at the 1:10:00 mark):
H/T Red State