You may never eat sourdough bread again.
In an article for Women’s Health, writer Caitlin Abber lauded the efforts of a fellow feminist who came up with a simply wonderful idea to combat sexist men: serve them a loaf of sourdough bread leavened with yeast that came from . . . her vagina.
Yes, you read that correctly.
But even before Abber delineated in detail the recipe from feminist blogger Zoe Stavri, she offered this preamble:
Sometimes, when the shit is hitting the fan and your uncle is being a sexist piece of garbage, you have to do something to regain control and remind yourself that you’re a badass bitch who no one can f*** with. And there’s no better way to do that than serving an a****** a slice of truly homemade bread...leavened with the yeast of your own vagina.
Stavri, who describes herself as “Anarchist. Feminist. Queer,” decided to invent her recipe after she had a bad yeast infection.
Stavri wrote on her blog:
Waking up on Saturday with the familiar itchy burny fanny, I giggled to myself, “Maybe I could make bread with that.” And that ticked into, “Well, I’ve always wanted to try making my own sourdough anyway,” and then a “F***, would that even work?” And then I got curious, and the next thing that happened was I was scraping white goop off of a dildo into a bowl of flour mixed with water.
Stavri added, “Making sourdough starter entails encouraging stuff that’s present in the flour and just sort of floating around in the air in your kitchen and on your utensils to grow. That’s what wild yeast is. ... Like all bread made with yeast, once it’s cooked, it’s not exactly going to go about colonizing your gut with yeast. The biggest risk with using candida albicans for bread making is that it won’t rise.”
Stavri bravely tweeted:
Stavri then went boldly where no woman has gone before:
It probably doesn’t matter that my sourdough may or may not contain any actual vaginal yeast. The very idea of it seems to horrify people more than enough. I suppose it’s a similar socially constructed disgust that leaves a whole bunch of people repulsed by the idea of licking a p***. Even the mere idea of a tiny trace of p**** in a massive loaf of bread is sufficiently vile.”
Abber delightedly concluded: “True—there's no doubt that a certain type of man (definitely that uncle of yours) would be disgusted by this recipe. Which is why it's so important for every woman to keep it in her back pocket! Happy Thanksgiving!”