The Navy just commissioned their new littoral combat ship, a 417-foot submarine sinker that can reach speeds above 40 knots—all while defending freedom and offending Democrats, simultaneously.

The ship was named in honor of Jackson, Mississippi, which would've been hunky-dory except that the city actually got it's name from former Democrat president and slave owner, Andrew Jackson.

"This is totally appalling," said the president of the Connecticut NAACP, Scot X. Esdaile. Jackson, Esdaile told CNN was "a big-time slavemaster, pro slavery, the whole nine yards."

The choice to christen the ship after the city was particularly beyond the pale, suggested Esdaile, because now that we have a black president.

"Amazing how we have an African-American president and the U.S. Navy slipped this thing through," -he said, adding, "I think it should be reconsidered."

And ships aren't the only things that get re-named in the liberal's world. On the way out: Democrats' annual Jefferson-Jackson dinners, which are systematically being renamed due to complaints from sensitive party members. (To make matters worse for Democrats, the Republicans' version of the dinners are "Lincoln Day events," reminding Dems that the great emancipators of slaves was in fact a Republican.)

Exit thought: A name nomination and banner for the NAACP's tugboat launch...

H/t Western Journalism.