Death Wish: WNBA Teams Up With Abortion Mill Planned Parenthood

The geniuses over at the WNBA put their heads together to devise a surefire plan to garner more support for their slow-paced, dunkless games, (their current average attendance is hovering around six people). The brilliant plan? Team up with the most divisive organization in politics: abortion mill Planned Parenthood.

On Thursday, the Seattle Storm officially announced their partnership with the lucrative nonprofit. The New York Times reports:

The ownership group of the Storm, Force 10, is planning a "Stand With Planned Parenthood" rally on July 18 in KeyArena’s West Plaza, along with continuing efforts to aid fund-raising for Planned Parenthood of the Great Northwest and the Hawaiian Islands. Five dollars from the sale of each ticket for the game that day between the Storm and the Chicago Sky will be donated to the chapter. The Storm, one of the few professional teams owned by women, will also host a fund-raising auction.

“Obviously, we are progressives, so throughout this year we’ve had conversations about what was going on in the country, and what we might as individuals might do about it,” Dawn Trudeau, co-owner of the Storm, told The Times.

A team co-owner told Trudeau that “a light bulb went off" when they attended a Planned Parenthood event: this was the scandal-ridden abortion mill they should team up with!

In an epic surprise, Trudeau admitted that the team "had not conducted any market research before joining forces with Planned Parenthood."

“We just made the decision as an ownership group,” she explained. “We were pretty confident that our fans would respond in a positive way, because we know the kind of people that we have coming to the arena, but we didn’t do any formal research."

Top officials of the abortion mill responsible for the murder of over 320,000 unborn babies annually are psyched over the support.

“This marks the first partnership we’ve ever had with a sports franchise,” said Executive Vice President of Planned Parenthood Federation of America Dawn Laguens. “This event and their support will help raise awareness among their fans and sports fans broadly.”

Players and coaches, paying little attention to how this might monetarily affect the league, were also pumped over the divisive anti-unborn baby move.

“As always, I’m so appreciative of a league that not only embraces our diversity but our status as women,” said Imani Boyette of the Chicago Sky. “Planned Parenthood is vital for women who don’t have access to standard health care. I was a P.P. patient in high school because I didn’t have health insurance. Taking a stand for things that affect the underprivileged, as a league and women of privilege, is how change happens.”

Lynx Coach Cheryl Reeve argues that it's "simply good business."

“I’m not sure that our league is any more uniquely positioned than the others,” Reeve said. “I think it’s more that athletes are using their platform more frequently and better to shine a light on things that interest them. From a business standpoint, I think that being open-minded about who you partner with is simply good business.”

To be clear, the WNBA is already struggling to survive. As reported by The Times in May 2016, the organization was pulling in "just below 200,000 on ESPN’s networks." Moreover, "Half of the WNBA’s 12 teams lose money, and they benefit from revenue generated by the NBA’s national television and sponsorship deals. This season, the $25 million the WNBA is getting from its primary broadcaster, ESPN, is a tiny fraction of the NBA’s average $930 million payment from ESPN and TNT, which will rise to about $2.6 billion next season."


The Times notes that it's unclear if other teams with join in on the partnership.

“We really weren’t doing it as something to encourage other teams to do it,” said Trudeau. “But if it does take off among other sports teams, it would be a wonderful thing.”

The women's organization waded into political waters before, most notably taking a stance in support of radical anti-cop group Black Lives Matter. For instance, players from the Minnesota Lynx and the Washington Mystics, among others, wore Black Lives Matter t-shirt as warm-up attire, last summer.

Apparently the WNBA has a death wish.


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